I desire the reader will observe, that I calculate my
remedy for this one individual Kingdom of Ireland, and for no other
that ever was, is, or, I think, ever can be upon Earth. Therefore
let no man talk to me of other expedients: Of taxing our absentees
at five shillings a pound: Of using neither cloaths, nor houshold
furniture, except what is of our own growth and manufacture: Of
utterly rejecting the materials and instruments that promote
foreign luxury: Of curing the expensiveness of pride, vanity,
idleness, and gaming in our women: Of introducing a vein of
parsimony, prudence and temperance: Of learning to love our
country, wherein we differ even from Laplanders, and the
inhabitants of Topinamboo: Of quitting our animosities and
factions, nor acting any longer like the Jews, who were murdering
one another at the very moment their city was taken: Of being a
little cautious not to sell our country and consciences for
nothing: Of teaching landlords to have at least one degree of mercy
towards their tenants. Lastly, of putting a spirit of honesty,
industry, and skill into our shop-keepers, who, if a resolution
could now be taken to buy only our native goods, would immediately
unite to cheat and exact upon us in the price, the measure, and the
goodness, nor could ever yet be brought to make one fair proposal
of just dealing, though often and earnestly invited to it.
Therefore I repeat, let no man talk to me of these and the like
expedients, 'till he hath at least some glympse of hope, that there
will ever be some hearty and sincere attempt to put them into
practice.
But, as to my self, having been wearied out for many years with
offering vain, idle, visionary thoughts, and at length utterly
despairing of success, I fortunately fell upon this proposal,
which, as it is wholly new, so it hath something solid and real, of
no expence and little trouble, full in our own power, and whereby
we can incur no danger in disobliging England. For this kind of
commodity will not bear exportation, and flesh being of too tender
a consistence, to admit a long continuance in salt, although
perhaps I could name a country, which would be glad to eat up our
whole nation without it.
After all, I am not so violently bent upon my own opinion, as to
reject any offer, proposed by wise men, which shall be found
equally innocent, cheap, easy, and effectual. But before something
of that kind shall be advanced in contradiction to my scheme, and
offering a better, I desire the author or authors will be pleased
maturely to consider two points. First, As things now stand, how
they will be able to find food and raiment for a hundred thousand
useless mouths and backs. And secondly, There being a round million
of creatures in humane figure throughout this kingdom, whose whole
subsistence put into a common stock, would leave them in debt two
million of pounds sterling, adding those who are beggars by
profession, to the bulk of farmers, cottagers and labourers, with
their wives and children, who are beggars in effect; I desire those
politicians who dislike my overture, and may perhaps be so bold to
attempt an answer, that they will first ask the parents of these
mortals, whether they would not at this day think it a great
happiness to have been sold for food at a year old, in the manner I
prescribe, and thereby have avoided such a perpetual scene of
misfortunes, as they have since gone through, by the oppression of
landlords, the impossibility of paying rent without money or trade,
the want of common sustenance, with neither house nor cloaths to
cover them from the inclemencies of the weather, and the most
inevitable prospect of intailing the like, or greater miseries,
upon their breed for ever.
I profess, in the sincerity of my heart, that I have not the
least personal interest in endeavouring to promote this necessary
work, having no other motive than the publick good of my country,
by advancing our trade, providing for infants, relieving the poor,
and giving some pleasure to the rich. I have no children, by which
I can propose to get a single penny; the youngest being nine years
old, and my wife past child-bearing.
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