She learned that he was ‘such an exquisite’ that before dressing for dinner or a dance he would sit for an hour with his feet propped above his head so he could squeeze them into elegant tight shoes. He wore huge showy epaulettes, his sword belt embroidered with golden oak leaves, and more embroidery around his silk stockings. He told her he was appalled that the provincial ladies of St Helena ‘understood nothing but kitchen dances and reels’, and he offered instruction in the mysteries of the quadrille. Even Mrs Balcombe joined his class, until she ‘unceremoniously put her foot on his heel, because he stood bending before her’ and the swallowtails of his coat nearly poked out her eye.15 She retired, but the young people continued dancing until the dawn cannon fired.

Napoleon was amused when he heard Betsy’s description, and urged her to obtain a pass for Carstairs to visit Longwood again. When one was procured, he told the young man, ‘putting on a most comical look’, that he ‘had heard from Miss Betsee that he was a great dandy—which was anything but pleasing intelligence to the young hero, who began to think he was indebted for the honour of his interview with the great man to the circumstance of his being considered a sort of tom-fool’.16 (Carstairs styled himself on Beau Brummell, unaware that the modish buck had recently left England because of gambling debts, having also angered the Prince Regent by describing him as a ‘fat friend’.17) After the visit, Napoleon told Betsy that it was unrealistic for her to consider Carstairs as a romantic prospect: ‘He is far too aristocratic for you, Betsee.’ It was kindly advice, considering the possibility of social disgrace familiar to Jane Austen’s readers (the fate of Lydia Bennet, for instance) which could befall a girl like Betsy: too pretty not to attempt to seduce, too poor or low in rank to marry. But according to Dame Mabel Brookes and Betsy’s diary account, she answered ‘You are jealous because he dances with me.’ Napoleon pulled her ear and turned away towards the pavilion without answering.18

Three days after the Regent’s fifty-fourth birthday, Napoleon’s forty-seventh was observed with little fanfare. He breakfasted in the garden marquee with members of his court. Gourgaud annoyed him by making up a floral bouquet, saying it was from Napoleon’s son, the King of Rome. ‘Bah!’ Napoleon exclaimed. ‘The King of Rome does not think any more about me now.’19 In the evening, according to O’Meara’s sardonic account, ‘the second class of domestics, including the English, had a grand supper and a dance afterwards. To the astonishment of the French, not an Englishman got drunk.’20

The following day, a birthday gift from Lady Holland was sent by the governor, an amazing machine for making ice using an air pump.21 Admiral Malcolm rode up to Longwood and discovered Napoleon and his companions in awe at a demonstration by the local upholsterer, ‘who understood the process’.22 Napoleon was fascinated when a cup of water was frozen in his presence in fifteen minutes. He remarked what a gratification that would have been in Egypt.23

Betsy and Jane came with their father to see the marvel. Napoleon was now the expert on the machine’s workings. ‘After making a cup of ice, he insisted upon my putting a large piece into my mouth, and laughed to see the contortions it induced from the excessive cold. It was the first ice that had ever been seen at St. Helena.’24

The governor called at Longwood for a discussion ‘principally about the necessity of reducing the expenses of the establishment’. He gave written instructions to Bertrand that the household budget be kept within £8000 a year. He offered to go through the items with him, but Bertrand replied: ‘The less communication you and I have either verbally or in writing the better.’ Lowe said the wish was reciprocal, and departed.25

If relations between Bonaparte and Lowe were bad before, they were about to become a great deal worse. On Sunday 18 August, Admiral Malcolm met the governor at Hutt’s Gate and, accompanied by Sir Thomas Reade and Major Gorrequer, they rode to Longwood together. They saw Bonaparte walking in the garden with Madame de Montholon and Count de Las Cases. The confrontation that followed was to sever all personal relations between the governor and his prisoner for the remainder of their lives. It was particularly painful for Lowe because he was insulted in front of the admiral and his own staff, with Dr O’Meara and Captain Poppleton listening in the background.

At first Napoleon exchanged pleasantries with the admiral, pointedly ignoring the governor’s presence. Lowe interrupted, saying he was sorry to raise a disagreeable subject but that the rude and improper conduct of Count Bertrand made it necessary. His instructions were that the expenses at Longwood had to be resolved and he needed to know with whom he could communicate.

Napoleon was silent for several minutes, walking to and fro, then he addressed himself to the admiral: ‘Count Bertrand is a man well known and esteemed in Europe; he has been distinguished and has commanded armies.’ He nodded in the direction of the governor: ‘He treats him like a corporal. Madame Bertrand is a lady well born, who has been accustomed to the first place in society; he does not treat her with the regard that is her due; he stops her letters and prevents her seeing those that wish to visit her, except under restrictions.’

Lowe interjected that he merely carried out his instructions; if his conduct was disapproved of by the government, he might readily be removed. ‘Since your arrival we have experienced nothing but vexations,’ Napoleon said, turning to him. ‘Your instructions are the same as Sir George Cockburn’s—he told me so—but you execute them with fifty times more rigour. He never vexed us with trifles . . .