My uncle, with a loud shout of triumph, and a strength that was irresistible, made his adversary retreat in the same direction, and plunging the old rapier into the very centre of a large red flower in the pattern of his waistcoat, nailed him beside his friend. There they both stood, gentlemen: jerking their arms and legs about in agony, like

30 CHARLES DICKENS

the toy-shop figures that are moved by a piece of packthread. My uncle always said, afterwards, that this was one of the surest means he knew of for disposing of an enemy; but it was liable to one objection on the ground of expense, inasmuch as it involved the loss of a sword for every man disabled.

" * The mail, the mail! ' cried the lady, running up to my uncle and throwing her beautiful arms around his neck; ' we may yet escape.'

" ' May!' cried my uncle; * why, my dear, there's nobody else to kill, is there? ' My uncle was rather disappointed, gentlemen, for he thought a little quiet bit of love-making would be agreeable after the slaughtering, if it were only to change the subject.

" ' We have not an instant to lose here,' said the young lady. * He (pointing to the young gentleman in sky-blue) is the only son of the powerful Marquess of Filletoville.*

" * Well, then, my dear, I'm afraid he'll never come to the title/ said my uncle, looking coolly at the young gentleman as he stood fixed up against the wall, in the cockchafer fashion I have described. * You have cut off the entail, my love.'

" ' I have been torn from my home and friends by these villains,' said the young lady, her features glowing with indignation. ' That wretch would have married me by violence in another hour.*

" * Confound his impudence! ' said my uncle, bestowing a very contemptuous look on the dying heir of Filletoville.

" * As you may guess from what you have seen,' said the young lady, * the party were prepared to murder me if I appealed to any one for assistance. If their accomplices find us here, we are lost. Two minutes hence may be too late. The mail! ' With these words, overpowered by her feelings, and the exertion of sticking the young Marquess of Filletoville, she sunk into my uncle's arms. My uncle caught her up, and bore her to the house-door. There stood the mail, with four long-tailed, flowing-maned, black horses, ready harnessed; but no coachman, no guard, no hostler even, at the horses' heads.

" Gentlemen, I hope I do no injustice to my uncle's memory, when I express my opinion, that although he was a bachelor, he had held some ladies in his arms before this time; I believe, indeed, that he had rather a habit of kissing

THE STORY OF THE BAGMAN'S UNCLE 31

barmaids; and I know that, in one or two instances, he had been seen by credible witnesses to hug a landlady in a very perceptible manner. I mention the circumstances to show what a very uncommon sort of person this beautiful young lady must have been, to have affected my uncle in the way she did; he used to say, that as her long dark hair trailed over his arm, and her beautiful dark eyes fixed themselves upon his face when she recovered, he felt so strange and nervous, that his legs trembled beneath him. But, who can look in a sweet soft pair of dark eyes without feeling queer? 7 can't, gentlemen. I am afraid to look at some eyes I know, and that's the truth of it.

You will never leave me,' murmured the young lady.

" ' Never,' said my uncle. And he meant it too.

" ' My dear preserver! ' exclaimed the young lady. * My dear, kind, brave preserver! '

Don't,' said my uncle, interrupting her. Why? ' inquired the young lady.

Because your mouth looks so beautiful when you speak,' rejoined my uncle, ' that I am afraid I shall be rude enough to kiss it.'

" The young lady put up her hand as if to caution my uncle not to do so, and said—no, she didn't say anything— she smiled. When you are looking at a pair of the most delicious lips in the world, and see them gently break into a roguish smile—if you are very near them, and nobody else by—you cannot better testify your admiration of their beautiful form and colour than by kissing them at once. My uncle did so, and I honour him for it.

Hark! ' cried the young lady, starting. ' The noise of wheels and horses! '

" ' So it is,' said my uncle, listening. He had a good ear for wheels and the tramping of hoofs; but there appeared to be so many horses and carriages rattling towards them from a distance, that it was impossible to form a guess at their number. The sound was like that of fifty brakes, with six blood cattle in each.

"'We are pursued! ' cried the young lady, clasping her hands. * We are pursued. I have no hope but in you! '

" There was such an expression of terror in her beautiful face, that my uncle made up his mind at once. He lifted her into the coach, told her not to be frightened, pressed his

32 CHARLES DICKENS

lips to hers once more, and then advising her to draw up the window to keep the cold air out, mounted to the box. Stay, love,' cried the young lady.

What's the matter? ' said my uncle, from the coachbox.

" * I want to speak to you,' said the young lady; ' only a word—only a word, dearest.*

Must I get down? ' inquired my uncle. The lady made no answer, but she smiled again. Such a smile, gentlemen!— it beat the other one all to nothing. My uncle descended from his perch in a twinkling.

What is it, my dear? ' said my uncle, looking in at the coach window. The lady happened to bend forward at the same time, and my uncle thought she looked more beautiful than she had done yet.