When the shit pile dries, the settlers stack it inside the house and use it for fuel.”

“You’re joking.”

“I ain’t.”

“I should think the stench would be horrific!” she said.

“Actually, it burns cleaner than you might think. Of course, if Mr. Pickett’s got hay, he might let you spend a good part of each day twistin’ it into bundles and stackin’ it in your sod house.”

“Yes, well as I say, I’m certain Mr. Pickett’s home is made of the finest wood money can buy.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“I don’t like your tone, Mr. Love, nor do I approve of the assumptions you’ve made about my fiancé.”

“Well, we’ll see when we get there. I hope he’s got a fine wood house, ’cause sod houses are fiercely cold in the winter, and scorchin’ hot in the summer. And they leak like crazy whenever it rains, which ain’t often enough. But when it does rain, it won’t stop. As the water comes through the sod, it turns the dirt into mud, at which point you and your husband and kids’ll be wearin’ half the house on your faces and clothes. But you can always rebuild your house, and the good news is, the more often it caves in on you, the better you’ll get at fixin’ it.

Phoebe was silent awhile. Finally she said, “If you’re mocking me, shame on you, since I’ve done nothing to warrant it. But if you’re being serious, I can see why it might be a hard life for a woman, particularly an Easterner, such as myself, who is ill-prepared to suddenly step into such a harsh lifestyle. On the other hand, if a man and women are in love, I’m sure they can overcome all sorts of hardships, including those you’ve taken the time to catalogue for me.”

“I s’pect you’re right,” I said. “And it’s a good thing, because there’s a lot more obstacles involved.”

“Such as?”

“Well, insects—spiders in partic’lar—love sod houses. Of course, your grass snakes and mice feel right at home in sod, too. On the plus side, if you’ve got a cat that’s a good mouser, he’ll stay fat and happy without your havin’ to feed him.”

“Anything else you may have forgotten to say?”

“Well, if you’ve studied up on prairie life, you probably know sod folk don’t generally have outhouses. But you needn’t worry about privacy, since your neighbors are likely to live at least five miles away. You’ll spend weeks each year dealin’ with head lice, but when they’re finally gone it’ll be flea and tick season. Regardless of the season you’ll have body lice suckin’ your blood by day, and bedbugs by night. And if that ain’t enough—”

“Mr. Love?” Phoebe said.

“Yes ma’am?”

“Kindly shut up.”

 


 

 

 

40.

 

Everythin’ around us seemed dead. There weren’t a dragon fly, grasshopper, or jack rabbit to be found anywhere among the parched earth. With all the snake holes we’d seen and prairie dog holes we’d tripped in, you’d think we would’ve seen a few by now. But no. The whole area was so dry I doubted there’d be so much as a drop of dew on the grass tomorrow mornin’.

I looked up. The position of the sun told me it was about four hours past noon, which didn’t seem possible after all we’d been through since dawn. It seemed a week ago instead of this mornin’ that Phoebe and I were discussin’ the journey. I knew then it’d be a hard trek, but I had no idea it would be this bad.

I’m no stranger to hard work.