If I now thought of my first, my only charmer, it was still with the tenderness and regret of the fondest love, embitter'd with the consciousness that I was no longer worthy of him. I could have begg'd my bread with him all over the world, but wretch that I was, I had neither the virtue nor courage requisite not to outlive my separation from him!

Yet, had not my heart been thus pre-ingaged, Mr. H... might probably have been the sole master of it; but the place was full, and the force of conjunctures alone had made him the possessor of my person; the charms of which had, by the bye, been his sole object and passion, and were, of course, no foundation for a love either very delicate or very durable.

He did not return till six in the evening to take me away to my new lodgings; and my moveables being soon pack'd, and convey'd into a hackney-coach, it cost me but little regret to take my leave of a landlady whom I thought I had so much reason not to be overpleas'd with; and as for her part, she made no other difference to my staying or going, but what that of the profit created.

We soon got to the house appointed for me, which was that of a plain tradesman who, on the score of interest, was entirely at Mr. H...'s devotion, and who let him the first floor, very genteelly furnish'd, for two guineas a week, of which I was instated mistress, with a maid to attend me.

He stayed with me that evening, and we had a supper from a neighbouring tavern, after which, and a gay glass or two, the maid put me to bed. Mr. H... soon follow'd, and notwithstanding the fatigues of the preceding night, I found no quarter nor remission from him: he piqued himself, as he told me, on doing the honours of my new apartment.

The morning being pretty well advanc'd, we got to breakfast; and the ice now broke, my heart, no longer engross'd by love, began to take ease, and to please itself with such trifles as Mr. H...'s liberal liking led him to make his court to the usual vanity of our sex. Silks, laces, ear-rings, pearl-necklace, gold watch, in short, all the trinkets and articles of dress were lavishly heap'd upon me; the sense of which, if it did not create returns of love, forc'd a kind of grateful fondness something like love; a distinction it would be spoiling the pleasure of nine tenths of the keepers in the town to make, and is, I suppose, the very good reason why so few of them ever do make it.

I was now establish'd the kept mistress in form, well lodg'd, with a very sufficient allowance, and lighted up with all the lustre of dress.

Mr. H... continu'd kind and tender to me; yet, with all this, I was far from happy; for, besides my regret for my dear youth, which, though often suspended or diverted, still return'd upon me in certain melancholic moments with redoubled violences, I wanted more society, more dissipation.

As to Mr. H..., he was so much my superior in every sense, that I felt it too much to the disadvantage of the gratitude I ow'd him. Thus he gain'd my esteem, though he could not raise my taste; I was qualify'd for no sort of conversation with him except one sort, and that is a satisfaction which leaves tiresome intervals, if not fill'd up by love, or other amusements.

Mr. H..., so experienc'd, so learned in the ways of women, numbers of whom had passed through his hands, doubtless soon perceiv'd this uneasiness, and without approving or liking me the better for it, had the complaisance to indulge me.

He made suppers at my lodgings, where he brought several companions of his pleasures, with their mistresses; and by this means I got into a circle of acquaintance that soon strip'd me of all the remains of bashfulness and modesty which might be yet left of my country education, and were, to a just taste, perhaps the greatest of my charms.

We visited one another in form, and mimic'd, as near as we could, all the miseries, the follies, and impertinences of the women of quality, in the round of which they trifle away their time, without its ever entering into their little heads that on earth there cannot subsist any thing more silly, more flat, more insipid and worthless, than, generally consider'd, their system of life is: they ought to treat the men as their tyrants, indeed! were they to condemn them to it.

But tho', amongst the kept mistresses (and I was now acquainted with a good many, besides some useful matrons, who live by their connexions with them), I hardly knew one that did not perfectly detest her keeper, and, of course, made little or no scruple of any infidelity she could safely accomplish, I had still no notion of wronging mine: for, besides that no mark of jealousy on his side induced in me the desire or gave me the provocation to play him a trick of that sort, and that his constant generosity, politeness, and tender attentions to please me forc'd a regard to him, that without affecting my heart, insur'd him my fidelity, no object had yet presented that could overcome the habitual liking I had contracted for him; and I was on the eve of obtaining, from the movements of his own voluntary generosity, a modest provision for life, when an accident happen'd which broke all the measures he had resolv'd upon in my favour.

I had now liv'd near seven months with Mr. H..., when one day returning to my lodgings from a visit in the neighbourhood, where I us'd to stay longer, I found the street door open, and the maid of the house standing at it, talking with some of her acquaintances, so that I came in without knocking; and, as I passed by, she told me Mr. H... was above. I stept up-stairs into my own bed-chamber, with no other thought than of pulling off my hat, etc., and then to wait upon him in the dining room, into which my bed-chamber had a door, as is common enough. Whilst I was untying my hat-strings, I fancied I heard my maid Hannah's voice and a sort of tussle, which raising my curiosity, I stole softly to the door, where a knot in the wood had been slipt out and afforded a very commanding peep-hole to the scene then in agitation, the actors of which had been too earnestly employ'd to hear my opening my own door, from the landing-place of the stairs, into my bed-chamber.

The first sight that struck me was Mr. H... pulling and hauling this coarse country strammel towards a couch that stood in a corner of the dining room; to which the girl made only a sort of aukward hoidening resistance, crying out so loud, that I, who listened at the door, could scarce hear her: »Pray sir, don't ..., let me alone ... I am not for your turn ... You cannot, sure, demean yourself with such a poor body as I... Lord! Sir, my mistress may come home ... I must not indeed ... I will cry out ...« All of which did not hinder her from insensibly suffering herself to be brought to the foot of the couch, upon which a push of no mighty violence serv'd to give her a very easy fall, and my gentleman having got up his hands to the strong-hold of her VIRTUE, she, no doubt, thought it was time to give up the argument, and that all further defense would be vain: and he, throwing her petticoats over her face, which was now as red as scarlet, discover'd a pair of stout, plump, substantial thighs, and tolerably white; he mounted them round his hips, and coming out with his drawn weapon, stuck it in the cloven spot, where he seem'd to find a less difficult entrance than perhaps he had flatter'd himself with (for, by the way, this blouze had left her place in the country, for a bastard), and, indeed, all his motions shew'd he was lodg'd pretty much at large. After he had done, his DEAREE gets up, drops her petticoats down, and smooths her apron and handkerchief. Mr. H...