How are you? ...

BABAKINA: Thank you very much indeed. [Sits down by her on the sofa.] Good evening, young people ...

[The guests rise and bow.]

FIRST GUEST [laughing]: Young people ... but you aren’t old?

BABAKINA [sighing] : How can we pass as young ...

FIRST GUEST [laughing politely]: Now come ... You may be a widow in name, but you can give any girl a handicap of ten.

[GAVRILA offers Babakina tea.]

ZINAIDA SAVISHNA [to Gavrila]: Why are you serving it like that? You should have brought some jam. Gooseberry or something ...

BABAKINA: Don’t worry. Thank you very much indeed ...

[A pause.]

FIRST GUEST: Marfa Yegorovna, did you come by Mushkino? ...

BABAKINA: No, by Zaymishche. The road’s better that way.

FIRST GUEST: Really.

KOSYKH: Two spades.

YEGORUSHKA: Pass.

AVDOTYA NAZAROVNA: Pass.

SECOND GUEST: Pass.

BABAKINA: Dearest Zinaida Savishna, the Government lottery issues2 have again gone up very quickly. I’ve never seen anything like it: the first issue is already two-seventy and the second almost two-fifty ... That’s never happened before ...

ZINAIDA SAVISHNA [sighing]: It’s nice for those who have a lot of them ...

BABAKINA: Don’t say that, my love; although their price is high, it doesn’t pay to keep one’s capital in them. The insurance alone will kill me.

ZINAIDA SAVISHNA: That may be, but still, my dear, you must have hopes ... [Sighs.] God is merciful ...

THIRD GUEST: As I see it, mesdames, I reason thus, that at the present time it is very unprofitable to have capital. Bonds give a very small dividend, and it is exceptionally risky to put money into circulation. I am of this understanding, mesdames, that a man who has capital at the present time is in a more critical situation, mesdames, than one who ...

BABAKINA [sighing]: That’s true.

[FIRST GUEST yawns.]

How can you yawn in front of ladies.

FIRST GUEST: Pardon, mesdames. I didn’t mean to.

[ZINAIDA SAVISHNA gets up and goes out by the right-hand door; a prolonged silence.]

YEGORUSHKA: Two diamonds.

AVDOTYA NAZAROVNA: Pass.

SECOND GUEST: Pass.

KOSYKH: Pass.

BABAKiNA [aside] : Lord, what boredom. I could die!

II

[The same, ZINAIDA SAVISHNA and LEBEDEV.

ZINAIDA SAVISHNA [coming through the right-hand door with Lebedev, quietly] : What are you doing settling down in there? What a prima donna! Sit with the guests. [Sits down in her previous place.]

LEBEDEV [yawning] : Oh, our sins weigh heavy! [Seeing Babakina] Lord, the pot of jam is sitting there! Our Turkish delight! [Greets her.] How is your most precious health? ...

BABAKiNA: Thank you very much indeed.

LEBEDEV: Well, thank God! ... Thank God! ... [Sits down in an armchair.] So ... so ... Gavrila!

[GAVRILA brings him a glass of vodka and a tumbler of water; he drinks the vodka and washes it down with some water.]

FIRST GUEST: Your good health!

LESEDEV: What good health? ... I’m not yet a corpse, and for that thanks. [To his wife] Zyuzyushka, where’s our birthday girl?

KOSYKH [plaintively]: For God’s sake tell me why we haven’t taken the trick? [He jumps up.] Why the devil have we lost?

AVDOTYA NAZAROVNA [jumping up, angrily]: Because, my friend, if you can’t play, you shouldn’t sit down at the table. What absolute right do you have to follow someone else’s suit? So you’ve been left with that pickled ace! ...

[Both run forward from the table.]

KOSYKH [in a tearful voice]: Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen ... I have in diamonds ace, king, queen and a sequence of eight, the ace of spades and one, just one, little heart, but she, devil knows why, couldn’t declare a little slam! ... I said no trumps ...

AVDOTYA NAZAROVNA A [interrupting]: I said no trumps! You said two no trumps ...

KOSYKH: This is disgraceful! ... Excuse me ... you have ... I have ... you have ... [To Lebedev] You be the judge, Pavel Kirillych ... I have in diamonds ace, king, queen and a sequence of eight ...

LEBEDEV [blocking his ears]: Leave me alone, do me that favour ...