When, at last, his eyes turned, and his lips opened,
this seemed to be done by machinery, and not by the will of a
living creature, or from the impulse of a rational soul. Lord
Colambre was so much struck with this strange physiognomy, that he
actually forgot much he had to say of springs and wheels. But it
was no matter. Whatever he had said, it would have come to the same
thing; and Mordicai would have answered as he now did—
'Sir, it was my partner made that bargain, not myself; and I
don't hold myself bound by it, for he is the sleeping-partner only,
and not empowered to act in the way of business. Had Mr. Berryl
bargained with me, I should have told him that he should have
looked to these things before his carriage went out of our
yard.'
The indignation of Lord Colambre kindled at these words—but in
vain. To all that indignation could by word or look urge against
Mordicai, he replied—
'Maybe so, sir; the law is open to your friend—the law is open
to all men who can pay for it.'
Lord Colambre turned in despair from the callous coach-maker,
and listened to one of his more compassionate-looking workmen, who
was reviewing the disabled curricle; and, whilst he was waiting to
know the sum of his friend's misfortune, a fat, jolly, Falstaff
looking personage came into the yard, accosted Mordicai with a
degree of familiarity, which, from a gentleman, appeared to Lord
Colambre to be almost impossible.
'How are you, Mordicai, my good fellow?' cried he, speaking with
a strong Irish accent.
'Who is this?' whispered Lord Colambre to the foreman, who was
examining the curricle.
'Sir Terence O'Fay, sir. There must be entire new wheels.'
'Now tell me, my tight fellow,' continued Sir Terence, holding
Mordicai fast, 'when, in the name of all the saints, good or bad,
in the calendar, do you reckon to let us sport the SUICIDE?'
Mordicai forcibly drew his mouth into what he meant for a smile,
and answered, 'As soon as possible, Sir Terence.'
Sir Terence, in a tone of jocose, wheedling expostulation,
entreated him to have the carriage finished OUT OF HAND. 'Ah, now!
Mordy, my precious! let us have it by the birthday, and come and
dine with us o' Monday, at the Hibernian Hotel—there's a rare
one—will you?'
Mordicai accepted the invitation, and promised faithfully that
the SUICIDE should be finished by the birthday. Sir Terence shook
hands upon this promise, and, after telling a good story, which
made one of the workmen in the yard—an Irishman—grin with delight,
walked off. Mordicai, first waiting till the knight was out of
hearing, called aloud—
'You grinning rascal! mind, at your peril, and don't let that
there carriage be touched, d'ye see, till further orders.'
One of Mr. Mordicai's clerks, with a huge long-feathered pen
behind his ear, observed that Mr. Mordicai was right in that
caution, for that, to the best of his comprehension, Sir Terence
O'Fay and his principal, too, were over head and ears in debt.
Mordicai coolly answered that he was well aware of that; but
that the estate could afford to dip further; that, for his part, he
was under no apprehension; he knew how to look sharp, and to bite
before he was bit. That he knew Sir Terence and his principal were
leagued together to give the creditors THE GO BY, but that, clever
as they both were at that work, he trusted he was their match.
'Will you be so good, sir, to finish making out this estimate
for me?' interrupted Lord Colambre.
'Immediately, sir. Sixty-nine pound four, and the perch. Let us
see—Mr. Mordicai, ask him, ask Paddy, about Sir Terence,' said the
foreman, pointing back over his shoulder to the Irish workman, who
was at this moment pretending to be wondrous hard at work. However,
when Mr. Mordicai defied him to tell him anything he did not know,
Paddy, parting with an untasted bit of tobacco, began, and
recounted some of Sir Terence O'Fay's exploits in evading duns,
replevying cattle, fighting sheriffs, bribing SUBS, managing cants,
tricking CUSTODEES, in language so strange, and with a countenance
and gestures so full of enjoyment of the jest, that, whilst
Mordicai stood for a moment aghast with astonishment, Lord Colambre
could not help laughing, partly at, and partly with, his
countryman. All the yard were in a roar of laughter, though they
did not understand half of what they heard; but their risible
muscles were acted upon mechanically, or maliciously, merely by the
sound of the Irish brogue.
Mordicai, waiting till the laugh was over, dryly observed that
'the law is executed in another guess sort of way in England from
what it is in Ireland'; therefore, for his part, he desired nothing
better than to set his wits fairly against such SHARKS. That there
was a pleasure in doing up a debtor which none but a creditor could
know.
'In a moment, sir; if you'll have a moment's patience, sir, if
you please,' said the slow foreman to Lord Colambre; 'I must go
down the pounds once more, and then I'll let you have it.'
'I'll tell you what, Smithfield,' continued Mr. Mordicai, coming
close beside his foreman, and speaking very low, but with a voice
trembling with anger, for he was piqued by his foreman's doubts of
his capacity to cope with Sir Terence O'Fay; 'I'll tell you what,
Smithfield, I'll be cursed, if I don't get every inch of them into
my power. You know how?'
'You are the best judge, sir,' replied the foreman; 'but I would
not undertake Sir Terence; and the question is, whether the estate
will answer the LOT of the debts, and whether you know them all for
certain?'
'I do, sir, I tell you. There's Green there's Blancham—there's
Gray—there's Soho—naming several more—and, to my knowledge, Lord
Clonbrony—'
'Stop, sir,' cried Lord Colambre in a voice which made Mordicai,
and everybody present, start—'I am his son—'
'The devil!' said Mordicai.
'God bless every bone in his body, then! he's an Irishman,'
cried Paddy; 'and there was the RASON my heart warmed to him from
the first minute he come into the yard, though I did not know it
till now.'
'What, sir! are you my Lord Colambre?' said Mr. Mordicai,
recovering, but not clearly recovering, his intellects. 'I beg
pardon, but I did not know you WAS Lord Colambre. I thought you
told me you was the friend of Mr. Berryl.'
'I do not see the incompatibility of the assertion, sir,'
replied Lord Colambre, taking from the bewildered foreman's
unresisting hand the account, which he had been so long
FURNISHING.
'Give me leave, my lord,' said Mordicai. 'I beg your pardon, my
lord, perhaps we can compromise that business for your friend Mr.
Berryl; since he is your lordship's friend, perhaps we can contrive
to COMPROMISE and SPLIT THE DIFFERENCE.'
TO COMPROMISE and SPLIT THE DIFFERENCE, Mordicai thought were
favourite phrases, and approved Hibernian modes of doing business,
which would conciliate this young Irish nobleman, and dissipate the
proud tempest which had gathered and now swelled in his breast.
'No, sir, no!' cried Lord Colambre, holding firm the paper. 'I
want no favour from you.
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