If only it would end when he opened his eyes. Pam would be in France waiting for him. He would go to her. They would be together again. They would be warm and safe and loving. If only!

He stumbled frantically through the snow. He could see almost nothing, nothing except the dim outline of the Stallion Barn, where he believed he would be safe from whatever was happening to him. Then everything went blank as he tried to move faster, weeping in his despair. He fell in the snow several more times, but always got up, struggling to his feet. He reached the barn door and threw it open.

He didn’t hear the Black’s neigh of welcome as he stood in the doorway, his body limp, his arms hanging straight down as if they were no longer a part of his body. He stood dazed, his eyes stark with shock.

“God,” he pleaded, “please help.” But no sound came from his lips.

He shook his head, trying to clear his mind, to think, to see. Even within the warm barn, he was unbearably cold, his teeth chattering. Straining his eyes, he stared at one stall after another, trying to find his horse. The intensity of his grief was something he found himself unable to cope with alone.

His voice was choked and hoarse when he found the Black’s stall and called to him. But the sound of his voice was unfamiliar to the stallion who waited at the door.

Alec stood in a daze after he entered the stall. The great black horse moved toward him, and Alec threw his arms around the slender neck and held on as if never to let him go. But his cries were for Pam, and the horse’s hoofs moved uneasily in the straw bedding.

The Black shoved his head hard against Alec, pushing him through the open doorway. Alec’s hand slid to the halter, grasping it tightly in his great need to stay close to his horse. And he made no protests as the Black pulled him along faster once they were in the corridor, going he knew not where. Nor did he care.

Several hours later Alec’s mind cleared somewhat and he found himself at the wheel of the pickup truck he used at the farm. He didn’t know how he’d gotten there or where he was going. His hands trembled on the wheel as he studied the winter road before him. There was an uncertainty about his movements and the truck skidded in the snow. It was as if he couldn’t remember how to do things, even drive.

What was he doing there? What had happened to him?

Half his mind was still with Pam and his thoughts paralyzed him. Alec shook his head, trying to see the road as distinctly as he saw Pam in his mind. She was standing before him, her head held high, smiling and so happy.

His eyes were full of tears as he continued looking at her. She remained as he saw her, a girl who talked with her blue eyes, her tilted head. He looked at her without touching, his eyes dwelling on her face. His body shook. She was so warm and near, so very real to him that he could feel the taste of her upon his lips.