Same old rearn’ on end—straight up. Same old
feelin’ that you’ve bested ’em this time. Same old little yank at your
mouth when you’re up good an’ tall. Same old Pegasus-act, wonderin’ where
you’ll ’light. Same old wop when you hit the dirt with your head where
your tail should be, and your in’ards shook up like a bran-mash. Same old
voice in your ear: ‘Waal, ye little fool, an’ what did you reckon to make
by that?’ We’re through with risin in our might on this farm. We go to
pole er single, accordin’ ez we’re hitched.”
“An’ Man the Oppressor sets an’ gloats over you, same as he’s settin’
now. Hain’t that been your experience, madam?”
This last remark was addressed to Tedda; and any one could see with
half an eye that poor, old anxious, fidgety Tedda, stamping at the flies,
must have left a wild and tumultuous youth behind her.
“’Pends on the man,” she answered, shifting from one foot to the other,
and addressing herself to the home horses. “They abused me dreffle when I
was young. I guess I was sperrity an’ nervous some, but they didn’t allow
for that.’Twas in Monroe County, Noo York, an’ sence then till I come
here, I’ve run away with more men than ’u’d fill a boardin’-house. Why,
the man that sold me here he says to the boss, s’ he: ‘Mind, now, I’ve
warned you. ’Twon’t be none of my fault if she sheds you daown the road.
Don’t you drive her in a top-buggy, ner ’thout winkers,’ s’ he, ’ner
’thought this bit ef you look to come home behind her.’ ’N’ the fust thing
the boss did was to git the top-buggy.”
“Can’t say as I like top-buggies,” said Rick; “they don’t balance
good.”
“Suit me to a ha’ar,” said Marcus Aurelius Antoninus. “Top-buggy means
the baby’s in behind, an’ I kin stop while she gathers the pretty
flowers—yes, an’ pick a maouthful, too. The women-folk all say I hev to be
humoured, an’—I don’t kerry things to the sweatin’-point.”
“’Course I’ve no prejudice against a top-buggy s’ long ’s I
can see it,” Tedda went on quickly. “It’s ha’f-seein’ the pesky thing
bobbin’ an’ balancn’ behind the winkers gits on my nerves. Then
the boss looked at the bit they’d sold with me, an’ s’ he: ‘Jiminy
Christmas! This ’u’d make a clothes-horse Stan’ ’n end!’ Then he gave me a
plain bar bit, an’ fitted it ’s if there was some feelin’ to my
maouth.”
“Hain’t ye got any, Miss Tedda?” said Tuck, who has a mouth like
velvet, and knows it.
“Might ’a’ had, Miss Tuck, but I’ve forgot. Then he give me an open
bridle,—my style’s an open bridle—an’—I dunno as I ought to tell this by
rights—he—give—me—a kiss.”
“My!” said Tuck, “I can’t tell fer the shoes o’ me what makes some men
so fresh.”
“Pshaw, sis,” said Nip, “what’s the sense in actin’ so? You
git a kiss reg’lar ‘s hitchin’-up time.”
“Well, you needn’t tell, smarty,” said Tuck, with a squeal and a
kick.
“I’d heard o’ kisses, o’ course,” Tedda went on, “but they hadn’t come
my way specially. I don’t mind tellin’ I was that took aback at that man’s
doin’s he might ha’ lit fire-crackers on my saddle. Then we went out jest
’s if a kiss was nothin’, an’ I wasn’t three strides into my gait ’fore I
felt the boss knoo his business, an’ was trustin’ me. So I studied to
please him, an’ whenever took the whip from the dash—a whip drives me
plumb distracted—an’ the upshot was that—waal, I’ve come up the Back
Pasture today, an’ the coupé’s tipped clear over twice, an’ I’ve waited
till ’twuz fixed each time. You kin judge for yourselves. I don’t set up
to be no better than my neighbours,—specially with my tail snipped off the
way ’tis,—but I want you all to know Tedda’s quit fightin’ in harness or
out of it, ’cep’ when there’s a born fool in the pasture, stuffin’ his
stummick with board that ain’t rightly hisn, ’cause he hain’t earned
it.”
“Meanin’ me, madam?” said the yellow horse.
“Ef the shoe fits, clinch it,” said Tedda, snorting. “I named
no names, though, to be sure, some folks are mean enough an’ greedy enough
to do ’thout ’em.”
“There’s a deal to be forgiven to ignorance,” said the yellow horse,
with an ugly look in his blue eye.
“Seemin’ly, yes; or some folks ’u’d ha’ been kicked raound the pasture
’bout onct a minute sence they came—board er no board.”
“But what you do not understand, if you will excuse me, madam,
is that the whole principle o’ servitood, which includes keep an’ feed,
starts from a radically false basis; an’ I am proud to say that me an’ the
majority o’ the horses o’ Kansas think the entire concern should be
relegated to the limbo of exploded superstitions. I say we’re too
progressive for that. I say we’re too enlightened for that. ’Twas good
enough ‘s long ‘s we didn’t think, but naow—but naow—a new loominary has
arisen on the horizon!”
“Meanin’ you?” said the Deacon.
“The horses o’ Kansas are behind me with their multitoodinous
thunderin’ hooves, an’ we say, simply but grandly, that we take our stand
with all four feet on the inalienable rights of the horse, pure and
simple,—the high-toned child o’ nature, fed by the same wavin’ grass,
cooled by the same ripplin’ brook— yes, an’ warmed by the same gen’rous
sun as falls impartially on the outside an’ the inside of the pampered
machine o’ the trottin’-track, or the bloated coupé-horses o’ these yere
Eastern cities. Are we not the same flesh an’ blood?”
“Not by a bushel an’ a half,” said the Deacon, under his breath.
“Grandee never was in Kansas.”
“My! Ain’t that elegant, though, abaout the wavin’ grass an’ the
ripplin’ brooks?” Tuck whispered in Nip’s ear. “The gentleman’s real
convincin’ I think.”
“I say we are the same flesh an’ blood! Are we to be
separated, horse from horse, by the artificial barriers of a
trottin’-record, or are we to look down upon each other on the strength o’
the gifts o’ nature—an extry inch below the knee, or slightly more
powerful quarters? What’s the use o’ them advantages to you? Man the
Oppressor comes along, an’ sees you’re likely an’ good-lookin’, an’ grinds
you to the face o’ the earth. What for? For his own pleasure: for his own
convenience! Young an’ old, black an’ bay, white an’ grey, there’s no
distinctions made between us. We’re ground up together under the
remorseless teeth o’ the engines of oppression!”
“Guess his breechin’ must ha’ broke goin’ daown-hill,” said the Deacon.
“Slippery road, maybe, an’ the buggy come onter him, an’ he didn’t know
’nough to hold back.
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