It
seemed an idiosyncrasy. The youngest gentleman in company proposed
a draught of water. Mr Pecksniff called him opprobious names for
the suggestion.
Jinkins and Gander took the rest upon themselves, and made him
as comfortable as they could, on the outside of his bed; and when
he seemed disposed to sleep, they left him. But before they had all
gained the bottom of the staircase, a vision of Mr Pecksniff,
strangely attired, was seen to flutter on the top landing. He
desired to collect their sentiments, it seemed, upon the nature of
human life.
'My friends,' cried Mr Pecksniff, looking over the banisters,
'let us improve our minds by mutual inquiry and discussion. Let us
be moral. Let us contemplate existence. Where is Jinkins?'
'Here,' cried that gentleman. 'Go to bed again'
'To bed!' said Mr Pecksniff. 'Bed! 'Tis the voice of the
sluggard, I hear him complain, you have woke me too soon, I must
slumber again. If any young orphan will repeat the remainder of
that simple piece from Doctor Watts's collection, an eligible
opportunity now offers.'
Nobody volunteered.
'This is very soothing,' said Mr Pecksniff, after a pause.
'Extremely so. Cool and refreshing; particularly to the legs! The
legs of the human subject, my friends, are a beautiful production.
Compare them with wooden legs, and observe the difference between
the anatomy of nature and the anatomy of art. Do you know,' said Mr
Pecksniff, leaning over the banisters, with an odd recollection of
his familiar manner among new pupils at home, 'that I should very
much like to see Mrs Todgers's notion of a wooden leg, if perfectly
agreeable to herself!'
As it appeared impossible to entertain any reasonable hopes of
him after this speech, Mr Jinkins and Mr Gander went upstairs
again, and once more got him into bed. But they had not descended
to the second floor before he was out again; nor, when they had
repeated the process, had they descended the first flight, before
he was out again. In a word, as often as he was shut up in his own
room, he darted out afresh, charged with some new moral sentiment,
which he continually repeated over the banisters, with
extraordinary relish, and an irrepressible desire for the
improvement of his fellow creatures that nothing could subdue.
Under these circumstances, when they had got him into bed for
the thirtieth time or so, Mr Jinkins held him, while his companion
went downstairs in search of Bailey junior, with whom he presently
returned. That youth having been apprised of the service required
of him, was in great spirits, and brought up a stool, a candle, and
his supper; to the end that he might keep watch outside the bedroom
door with tolerable comfort.
When he had completed his arrangements, they locked Mr Pecksniff
in, and left the key on the outside; charging the young page to
listen attentively for symptoms of an apoplectic nature, with which
the patient might be troubled, and, in case of any such presenting
themselves, to summon them without delay. To which Mr Bailey
modestly replied that 'he hoped he knowed wot o'clock it wos in
gineral, and didn't date his letters to his friends from Todgers's
for nothing.'
CHAPTER TEN
CONTAINING STRANGE MATTER, ON WHICH MANY EVENTS IN THIS HISTORY
MAY, FOR THEIR GOOD OR EVIL INFLUENCE, CHIEFLY DEPEND
But Mr Pecksniff came to town on business. Had he forgotten
that? Was he always taking his pleasure with Todgers's jovial
brood, unmindful of the serious demands, whatever they might be,
upon his calm consideration? No.
Time and tide will wait for no man, saith the adage. But all men
have to wait for time and tide. That tide which, taken at the
flood, would lead Seth Pecksniff on to fortune, was marked down in
the table, and about to flow. No idle Pecksniff lingered far
inland, unmindful of the changes of the stream; but there, upon the
water's edge, over his shoes already, stood the worthy creature,
prepared to wallow in the very mud, so that it slid towards the
quarter of his hope.
The trustfulness of his two fair daughters was beautiful indeed.
They had that firm reliance on their parent's nature, which taught
them to feel certain that in all he did he had his purpose straight
and full before him. And that its noble end and object was himself,
which almost of necessity included them, they knew. The devotion of
these maids was perfect.
Their filial confidence was rendered the more touching, by their
having no knowledge of their parent's real designs, in the present
instance. All that they knew of his proceedings was, that every
morning, after the early breakfast, he repaired to the post office
and inquired for letters. That task performed, his business for the
day was over; and he again relaxed, until the rising of another sun
proclaimed the advent of another post.
This went on for four or five days. At length, one morning, Mr
Pecksniff returned with a breathless rapidity, strange to observe
in him, at other times so calm; and, seeking immediate speech with
his daughters, shut himself up with them in private conference for
two whole hours. Of all that passed in this period, only the
following words of Mr Pecksniff's utterance are known:
'How he has come to change so very much (if it should turn out
as I expect, that he has), we needn't stop to inquire. My dears, I
have my thoughts upon the subject, but I will not impart them. It
is enough that we will not be proud, resentful, or unforgiving. If
he wants our friendship he shall have it.
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