And she
knew me.”
“She
didn’t know you,” I broke out; “she said she was mistaken.”
Shreve
pounced on this in a flash. “Ah—so at first she thought she did?” He laughed.
“I don’t wonder she said afterward she was mistaken. I don’t dye my hair yet,
but I’m afraid I’ve put on nearly as much weight as Cassie Donovan.” He paused
again, and then added: “All the same, Severance, she did know me.”
I
looked at the little journalist and laughed back at him.
“What
are you laughing at?”
“At you. At such a perfect case of
professional deformation. Wherever you go you’re bound to spot a
criminal; but I should have thought even Mont Soleil could have produced a
likelier specimen than my friend Mrs. Ingram.”
He
looked a little startled at my tone. “Oh, see here; if she’s such a friend I’m
sorry I said anything.”
I
rose to heights of tolerance. “Nothing you can say can harm her, my dear
fellow.”
“Harm
her? Why on earth should it? I don’t want to harm her.”
“Then
don’t go about spreading such ridiculous gossip. I don’t suppose any one cares
to be mistaken for a woman who’s been tried for her life; and if I were a
relation of Mrs. Ingram’s I’m bound to tell you I should feel obliged to put a
stop to your talk.”
He
stared in surprise, and I thought he was going to retort in the same tone; but
he was a fair-minded little fellow, and after a moment I could see he’d
understood. “All right, Severance; of course I don’t want to do anything
that’ll bother her…”
“Then
don’t go on talking as if you still thought she was Kate Spain.”
He
gave a hopeless shrug. “All right. I won’t. Only she is, you know; what’ll you bet on it, old
man?”
“Good
night,” I said with a nod, and turned away. It was obviously a fixed idea with
him; and what harm could such a crank do to me, much less to a woman like Mrs.
Ingram?
As
I left him he called after me: “If she ain’t, who is she? Tell me that, and
I’ll believe you.”
I
walked away without answering.
IV.
I
went up to bed laughing inwardly at poor Jimmy Shreve. His craving for the
sensational had certainly deformed his critical faculty. How it would amuse
Mrs. Ingram to hear that he had identified her with the wretched Kate Spain!
Well, she should hear it; we’d laugh over it together the next day. For she had
said, in bidding me goodnight: “You’ll tell me the rest in the morning.” And
that meant—could only mean—that she was going to listen to me, and if she were
going to listen, she must be going to answer as I wished her to…
Those
were my thoughts as I went up to my room. They were scarcely less confident
while I was undressing. I had the hope, the promise almost, of what, at the
moment, I most wished for—the only thing I wished for, in fact. I was amazed at
the intensity with which I wished it. From the first I had tried to explain
away my passion by regarding it as the idle man’s tendency to fall into
sentimental traps; but I had always known that what I felt was not of that
nature. This quiet woman with the wide pale eyes and melancholy mouth had taken
possession of me; she seemed always to have inhabited my mind and heart; and as
I lay down to sleep I tried to analyze what it was in her that made her seem
already a part of me.
But
as soon as my light was out I knew I was going to lie awake all night; and all
sorts of unsought problems instantly crowded out my sentimental musings. I had
laughed at Shreve’s inept question: “If she ain’t Kate Spain, who is she?” But now an insistent voice within me echoed: Who is
she? What, in short, did I know of her? Not one single fact which would have
permitted me to disprove his preposterous assertion. Who was she? Was she
married, unmarried, divorced, a widow? Had she children, parents, relations
distant or near? Where had she lived before going to California, and when had she gone there? I knew
neither her birthplace, nor her maiden name, or indeed any fact about her
except the all-dominating fact of herself.
In
rehearsing our many talks with the pitiless lucidity of sleeplessness I saw
that she had the rare gift of being a perfect listener; the kind whose silence
supplies the inaudible questions and answers most qualified to draw one on. And
I had been drawn on; ridiculously, fatuously, drawn on. She was in possession
of all the chief facts of my modest history. She knew who I was, where I came
from, who were my friends, my family, my antecedents; she was fully informed as
to my plans, my hopes, my preferences, my tastes and hobbies. I had even
confided to her my passion for Brahms and for book-collecting, and my dislike
for the wireless, and for one of my brothers-in-law. And in return for these
confidences she had given me—what? An understanding smile,
and the occasional murmur: “Oh, do you feel that too? I’ve always felt it.”
Such
was the actual extent of my acquaintance with Mrs. Ingram; and I perceived
that, though I had laughed at Jimmy Shreve’s inept assertion, I should have
been utterly unable to disprove it. I did not know who Mrs.
1 comment