Ede. Hender was
at the machine, but Kate, who had a dressing-gown on order, unrolled the
blue silk and fidgeted round the table as if she had not enough room for
laying out her pattern-sheets. Hender noticed these manoeuvres with some
surprise, and when Kate said, 'Now, my dear children, I'm afraid you're
very much in my way; you'd better go downstairs,' she looked up with the
expression of one who expects to be told a secret. This manifest certitude
that something was coming troubled Kate, and she thought it would be better
after all to say nothing about Mr. Lennox, but again changing her mind, she
said, assuming an air of indifference:
'Mr. Lennox will be here on Monday. I've just got a letter from him.'
'Oh, I'm so glad; for perhaps this time it will be possible to have one
spree on the strict q.t.'
Kate was thinking of exactly the same thing, but Miss Hender's crude
expression took the desire out of her heart, and she remained silent.
'I'm sure it's for you he's coming,' said the assistant. 'I know he likes
you; I could see it in his eyes. You can always see if a man likes you by
his eyes.'
Although it afforded Kate a great deal of pleasure to think that Dick liked
her, it was irritating to hear his feelings for her discussed; she could
not forget she was a married woman, and she began to regret that she ever
mentioned the subject at all, when Miss Hender said:
'But what's the use of his coming if you can't get out? A man always
expects a girl to be able to go out with him. The "hag" is sure to be
about, and even if you did manage to give her the slip, there's your
husband. Lord! I hadn't thought of that before. What damned luck! Don't you
wish he'd get ill again? Another fit of asthma would suit us down to the
ground.'
The blood rushed to Kate's face, and snapping nervously with the scissors
in the air, she said:
'I don't know how you can bring yourself to speak in that way. How can you
think that I would have my husband ill so that I might go to the theatre
with Mr. Lennox? What do you fancy there is between us that makes you say
such a thing as that?'
'Oh, I really don't know,' Miss Hender answered with a toss of her head;
'if you're going to be hoighty-toighty I've done.'
Kate thought it very provoking that Hender could never speak except
coarsely, and it would have given her satisfaction to have said something
sharp, but she had let Hender into a good many of her secrets, and it would
be most inconvenient to have her turn round on her. Not, indeed, that she
supposed she'd be wicked enough to do anything of the kind, but still——
And influenced by these considerations, Kate determined not to quarrel with
Hender, but to avoid speaking to her of Dick. Even with her own people she
maintained an attitude of shy reserve until Dick arrived, declining on all
occasions to discuss the subject, whether with her husband or
mother-in-law. 'I don't care whether he comes or not; decide your quarrels
as you like, I've had enough of them,' was her invariable answer. This air
of indifference ended by annoying Ralph, but she was willing to do that if
it saved her from being forced into expressing an opinion—that was the
great point; for with a woman's instinct she had already divined that she
would not be left out of the events of the coming week. But there was still
another reason. She was a little ashamed of her own treachery. Otherwise
her conscience did not trouble her; it was crushed beneath a weight of
desire and expectancy, and for three or four days she moved about the house
in a dream. When she met her husband on the stairs and he joked her about
the roses in her cheeks, she smiled curiously, and begged him to let her
pass. In the workroom she was happy, for the mechanical action of sewing
allowed her to follow the train of her dreams, and drew the attention of
those present away from her. She had tried her novels, but now the most
exciting failed to fix her thoughts. The page swam before her eyes, a
confusion of white and black dots, the book would fall upon her lap in a
few minutes, and she would relapse again into thinking of what Dick would
say to her, and of the hours that still separated them. On Sunday, without
knowing why, she insisted on attending all the services. Ralph in no way
cared for this excessive devotion, and he proposed to take her for a walk
in the afternoon, but she preferred to accompany Mrs. Ede to church. It
loosened the tension of her thoughts to raise her voice in the hymns, and
the old woman's gabble was pleasant to listen to on their way home—a sort
of meaningless murmur in her ears while she was thinking of Dick, whom she
might meet on the doorstep. It was, however, his portmanteau that they
caught sight of in the passage when they opened the door.
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