Loss of

virginity is rational increase, and there was never virgin got122

till virginity was first lost. That you were made of is mettle123 to

make virgins. Virginity by being once lost may be ten times

found. By being ever kept, it is ever lost. ’Tis too cold125 a

companion. Away with’t!

HELEN    I will stand for’t127 a little, though therefore I die a

virgin.

PAROLLES    There’s little can be said in’t129, ’tis against the rule of

nature. To speak on the part130 of virginity is to accuse your

mothers, which is most infallible disobedience. He that131

hangs himself is a virgin: virginity murders itself and should

be buried in highways out of all sanctified limit133, as a

desperate offendress134 against nature. Virginity breeds mites,

much like a cheese, consumes itself to the very paring135, and

so dies with feeding his own stomach.136 Besides, virginity is

peevish137, proud, idle, made of self-love, which is the most

inhibited sin in the canon.138 Keep it not, you cannot choose

but lose by’t. Out with’t! Within ten year it will make itself139

two, which is a goodly increase, and the principal140 itself not

much the worse. Away with’t!

HELEN    How142 might one do, sir, to lose it to her own liking?

PAROLLES    Let me see. Marry, ill, to like him that ne’er it143 likes.

’Tis a commodity will lose the gloss with lying144: the longer

kept, the less worth. Off with’t while ’tis vendible. Answer145

the time of request. Virginity, like an old courtier, wears her

cap out of fashion: richly suited but unsuitable147, just like the

brooch and the toothpick, which wear not now. Your date148 is

better in your pie and your porridge than in your cheek.149 And

your virginity, your old virginity, is like one of our French

withered pears: it looks ill, it eats dryly.151 Marry, ’tis a withered

pear: it was formerly better: marry, yet ’tis a withered pear.

Will you anything with it?

HELEN    Not my virginity yet —

There155 shall your master have a thousand loves,

A mother156 and a mistress and a friend,

A phoenix157, captain and an enemy,

A guide, a goddess, and a sovereign,

A counsellor, a traitress, and a dear.

His humble ambition, proud humility,

His jarring concord, and his discord dulcet161,

His faith, his sweet disaster.162 With a world

Of pretty, fond, adoptious christendoms163

That blinking Cupid gossips.164 Now shall he —

I know not what he shall. God send him well!165

The court’s a learning place, and he is one—

PAROLLES    What one, i’faith?

HELEN    That I wish well. ’Tis pity—

PAROLLES    What’s pity?

HELEN    That wishing well had not a body170 in’t,

Which might be felt, that we, the poorer born,

Whose baser stars do shut us up in172 wishes,

Might with effects of them173 follow our friends,

And show what we alone must think174, which never

Returns us thanks.175

Enter Page

PAGE    Monsieur Parolles, my lord calls for you.

[Exit]

PAROLLES    Little Helen, farewell. If I can remember thee, I will

think of thee at court.

HELEN    Monsieur Parolles, you were born under a charitable star.

PAROLLES    Under Mars, ay.180

HELEN    I especially think, under Mars.

PAROLLES    Why under Mars?

HELEN    The wars hath so kept you under183 that you must

needs be born under Mars.

PAROLLES    When he was predominant.185

HELEN    When he was retrograde186, I think rather.

PAROLLES    Why think you so?

HELEN    You go so much backward188 when you fight.

PAROLLES    That’s for advantage.189

HELEN    So is running away, when fear proposes the safety.

But the composition191 that your valour and fear makes in you

is a virtue of a good wing, and I like the wear192 well.

PAROLLES    I am so full of businesses, I cannot answer thee

acutely. I will return perfect courtier in the which194, my

instruction shall serve to naturalize195 thee, so thou wilt

be capable of196 a courtier’s counsel and understand what

advice shall thrust197 upon thee. Else thou diest in thine

unthankfulness, and thine ignorance makes thee away.198

Farewell. When thou hast leisure199, say thy prayers. When

thou hast none, remember thy friends. Get thee a good

husband, and use201 him as he uses thee. So, farewell.

[Exit]

HELEN    Our remedies oft in ourselves do lie,

Which we ascribe to heaven. The fated203 sky

Gives us free scope, only doth backward pull

Our slow designs when we ourselves are dull.205

What power is it which mounts my love so high,

That makes me see, and cannot feed207 mine eye?

The mightiest space in fortune208 nature brings

To join like likes and kiss like native209 things.

Impossible be strange attempts210 to those

That weigh their pains in sense211 and do suppose

What hath been cannot be. Who ever strove

To show her merit that did miss213 her love?

The king’s disease — my project may deceive me,

But my intents are fixed and will not leave me.

Exit

[Act 1 Scene 2]

running scene 2

Flourish cornets. Enter the King of France, with letters, and divers Attendants

KING    The Florentines and Senoys are by th’ears1,

Have fought with equal fortune and continue

A braving3 war.

FIRST LORD    So ’tis reported, sir.

KING    Nay, ’tis most credible. We here receive it

A certainty, vouched from our cousin6 Austria,

With caution that the Florentine will move7 us

For speedy aid, wherein our dearest friend8

Prejudicates9 the business and would seem

To have us make denial.10

FIRST LORD    His love and wisdom,

Approved12 so to your majesty, may plead

For amplest credence.13

KING    He hath armed14 our answer,

And Florence15 is denied before he comes:

Yet, for our gentlemen that mean to see16

The Tuscan service17, freely have they leave

To stand on either part.18

SECOND LORD    It well may serve

A nursery to our gentry, who are sick20

For breathing and exploit.21

KING    What’s he comes here?

Enter Bertram, Lafew and Parolles

FIRST LORD    It is the Count Rossillion, my good lord,

Young Bertram.

To Bertram

KING    Youth, thou bear’st thy father’s face.

Frank nature, rather curious than in haste26,

Hath well composed thee. Thy father’s moral parts27

Mayst thou inherit too! Welcome to Paris.

BERTRAM    My thanks and duty are your majesty’s.

KING    I would I had that corporal soundness30 now,

As when thy father and myself in friendship

First tried our soldiership. He did look far32

Into the service of the time and was33

Discipled of the bravest.34 He lasted long,

But on us both did haggish35 age steal on

And wore us out of act. It much repairs36 me

To talk of your good father; in his youth

He had the wit which I can well observe

Today in our young lords. But they may jest

Till their own scorn return to them unnoted40

Ere they can hide their levity in honour.41

So like a courtier, contempt42 nor bitterness

Were in his pride or sharpness; if they were,

His equal had awaked44 them, and his honour,

Clock to itself, knew the true45 minute when

Exception46 bid him speak, and at this time

His tongue obeyed his hand. Who47 were below him

He used as creatures of another place48

And bowed his eminent top49 to their low ranks,

Making them proud of his humility,

In their poor praise he humbled.51 Such a man

Might be a copy52 to these younger times;

Which, followed well, would demonstrate them now53

But goers backward.

BERTRAM    His good remembrance, sir,

Lies richer in your thoughts than on his tomb,

So in approof57 lives not his epitaph

As in your royal speech.

KING    Would I were with him! He would always say —

Methinks I hear him now.