“Yes, I already told you I’m coming to the party. How can I not? Can you imagine their faces when they hear the news?”

He laughs, then says, “I’ll take a shower right now. See you in a few, okay?” Pause. “Thank you! You’re the best!”

He dances past the doorway into the master bath, and turns on the shower, leaving Milo thoroughly confused about what to do.

The sonovabitch won the fucking lottery? Surely not. And yet, how could anyone be that excited unless they knew for certain?

Jake’s in the shower. This is the perfect time to kill him.

Except that Jake was obviously talking to Faith just now, which means she’s on her way back home, which means he can’t kill Jake without ruining Faith’s alibi.

Not to mention if Jake and Faith have truly just won the lottery, killing Jake would give Faith a huge motive for the killing.

It’s a crazy situation.

Faith’s on her way home, where she knows Milo’s waiting to kill her husband. She can’t call to tell him not to kill Jake, because Milo’s phone’s at his mom’s house.

It’s also an interesting situation, because Faith knows Milo’s hiding in her closet. She’ll have to make love to Jake knowing Milo will probably sneak out and peek at them. Sure, she’ll insist on doing it somewhere else in the house, but that won’t stop him from finding them. She’ll see him watching, but won’t be able to do anything about it!

How’s that for secret knowledge, Faith?

Milo smiles. He’s going to see her naked a second time. Having sex! He can’t wait to see the look on her face when she sees him wearing her bra and panties while watching them.

She will absolutely freak!

Jake finishes his shower, towels dry, walks past Faith’s doorway wearing boxers. He enters his closet and puts on a pair of warm up pants, but remains shirtless.

Moments later the door beeps, and he hustles off to greet Faith.

Except that it’s not Faith.

It can’t be Faith because they’re heading his way, toward the master bedroom. No way Faith would fuck Jake in the master bedroom knowing Milo’s here.

He hears them enter the bedroom.

Jake says, “I can’t believe you came.”

She says, “We need to be quick.”

Milo’s face drops. A ball of ice forms in the pit of his stomach. It was only five words, but it was enough to make him retch. He covers his face with his shirt to keep the sound down while hearing Jake say, “Lift up your dress!”

Milo’s not in the same room, so it’s not like he could hear her perfectly when she said they needed to be quick. Sound’s a funny thing. Maybe it caught him funny, maybe he was thinking about the party, or maybe he was still dazed and confused about whether to shoot Jake or not. God knows, he’s been under an amazing amount of stress the last hour or so, and his mind could be playing tricks on him.

Just as he convinces himself that the woman lifting her dress up in the next room couldn’t possibly, in a million years, be Lemon Fister, he hears her say, “Wait. Let me take it off completely. I can’t go to my own birthday party with semen stains on my dress!”

“Good point,” Jake says.

Milo waits a minute, then opens the door, walks a few steps, peeks around the corner, and watches his wife, Lemon Fister, getting thoroughly fucked by his friend, Jake Stallone. When it’s over, she says, “Wait, I brought you something.”

She reaches in her purse and pulls something out.

Jake laughs. “You’ve bought Milo another toothbrush?”

“I have. Do your thing.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive. It never gets old.”

“Okay,” Jake says. Then, to Milo’s horror, he runs the bristles up his ass and hands her back the toothbrush.

“You know this is completely childish,” Jake says.

“I know.