When he sat down he desperately endeavoured to rouse
himself, and as he knew that all the strong interests are egotistic,
he made an effort to grow warm over the work he had done, to find a
glow of satisfaction in the thought that he had accomplished
something. It was nonsense; he had found out a clever trick and had
made the most of it, and it was over. Besides, how would it interest
him if afterwards he was praised when he was dead? And what was the
use of trying to invent some new tricks? It was folly; and he ground
his teeth as a new idea came into his mind and was rejected. To get
drunk always made him so horribly ill, and other things were more
foolish and tiresome than poesy or painting, whichever it was.
He could not even rest on the uncomfortable bench, beneath the
dank, stinking plane tree. A young man and a girl came up and sat
next to him, and the girl said, "Oh, isn't it beautiful to-day?" and
then they began to jabber to one another—the blasted fools! He
flung himself from the seat and went out into Holborn.
As far as one could see, there were two processions of omnibuses,
cabs, and vans that went east and west and west and east. Now the
long line would move on briskly, now it stopped. The horses' feet
rattled and pattered on the asphalt, the wheels ground and jarred, a
bicyclist wavered in and out between the serried ranks, jangling his
bell. The foot-passengers went to and fro on the pavement, with an
endless change of unknown faces; there was an incessant hum and
murmur of voices. In the safety of a blind passage an Italian whirled
round the handle of his piano-organ; the sound of it swelled and sank
as the traffic surged and paused, and now and then one heard the
shrill voices of the children who danced and shrieked in time to the
music. Close to the pavement a coster pushed his barrow, and
proclaimed flowers in an odd intonation, reminding one of the
Gregorian chant. The cyclist went by again with his jangling,
insistent bell, and a man who stood by the lamp-post set fire to his
pastille ribbon, and let the faint blue smoke rise into the sun. Away
in the west, where the houses seemed to meet, the play of sunlight on
the haze made, as it were, golden mighty shapes that paused and
advanced, and paused again.
He had viewed the scene hundreds of times, and for a long while
had found it a nuisance and a weariness. But now, as be walked
stupidly, slowly, along the southern side of Holborn, a change fell.
He did not in the least know what it was, but there seemed to be a
strange air, and a new charm that soothed his mind.
When the traffic was stopped, to his soul there was a solemn hush
that summoned remnants of a far-off memory. The voices of the
passengers sank away, the street was endued with a grave and reverent
expectation. A shop that he passed had a row of electric lamps
burning above the door, and the golden glow of them in the sunlight
was, he felt, significant. The grind and jar of the wheels, as the
procession moved on again, gave out a chord of music, the opening of
some high service that was to be done, and now, in an ecstasy, he was
sure that he heard the roll and swell and triumph of the organ, and
shrill sweet choristers began to sing. So the music sank and swelled
and echoed in the vast aisle—in Holborn.
What could these lamps mean, burning in the bright sunlight? The
music was hushed in a grave close, and in the rattle of traffic he
heard the last deep, sonorous notes shake against the choir
walls—he had passed beyond the range of the Italian's
instrument. But then a rich voice began alone, rising and falling in
monotonous but awful modulations, singing a longing, triumphant song,
bidding the faithful lift up their hearts, be joined in heart with
the Angels and Archangels, with the Thrones and Dominations. He could
see no longer, he could not see the man who passed close beside him,
pushing his barrow, and calling flowers.
Ah! He could not be mistaken, he was sure now. Tho air was blue
with incense, he smelt the adorable fragrance. The time had almost
come. And then the silvery, reiterated, instant summons of a bell;
and again, and again.
The tears fell from his eyes, in his weeping the tears poured a
rain upon his cheeks. But he saw in the distance, in the far
distance, the carven tabernacle, golden mighty figure a moving
slowly, imploring arms stretched forth.
There was a noise of a great shout; the choir sang in the tongue
of his boyhood that he had forgotten:
SANT… SANT… SANT
Then the silvery bell tinkled anew; and again, and again. He
looked and saw the Holy, White, and Shining Mysteries
exhibited—in Holborn.
Psychology
Mr. Dale, who had quiet rooms in a western part of London, was
very busily occupied one day with a pencil and little scraps of
paper. He would stop in the middle of his writing, of his monotonous
tramp from door to window, jot down a line of hieroglyphics, and turn
again to his work. At lunch he kept his instruments on the table
beside him, and a little notebook accompanied him on his evening walk
about the Green. Sometimes he seemed to experience a certain
difficulty in the act of writing, as if the heat of shame or even
incredulous surprise held his hand, but one by one the fragments of
paper fell into the drawer, and a full feast awaited him at the day's
close.
As he lit his pipe at dusk, he was standing by the window and
looking out into the street. In the distance cab-lights flashed to
and fro, up and down the hill, on the main road. Across the way he
saw the long line of sober grey houses, cheerfully lit up for the
most part, displaying against the night the dining-room and the
evening meal.
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