In one house, just opposite, there was brighter
illumination, and the open windows showed a modest dinner-party in
progress, and here and there a drawing-room on the first floor glowed
ruddy, as the tall shaded lamp was lit. Everywhere Dale saw a quiet
and comfortable respectability; if there were no gaiety there was no
riot, and he thought himself fortunate to have got "rooms" in so sane
and meritorious a street.
The pavement was almost deserted. Now and again a servant would
dart out from a side door and scurry off in the direction of the
shops, returning in a few minutes in equal haste. But foot-passengers
were rare, and only at long intervals a stranger would drift from the
highway and wander with slow speculation down Abingdon Road, as if he
had passed its entrance a thousand times and had at last been piqued
with curiosity and the desire of exploring the unknown. All the
inhabitants of the quarter prided themselves on their quiet and
seclusion, and many of them did not so much as dream that if one
went, far enough the road degenerated and became abominable, the home
of the hideous, the mouth of a black purlieu. Indeed, stories, ill
and malodorous, were told of the streets parallel to east and west,
which perhaps communicated with the terrible sink beyond, but those
who lived at the good end of Abingdon Road knew nothing of their
neighbours.
Dale leant far out of his window. The pale London sky deepened to
violet as the lamps were lit, and in the twilight the little gardens
before the houses shone, seemed as if they grew more clear. The
golden laburnum but reflected the last bright yellow veil that had
fallen over the sky after sunset, the white hawthorn was a gleaming
splendour, the red may a flameless fire in the dusk. From the open
window, Dale could note the increasing cheerfulness of the diners
opposite, as the moderate cups were filled and emptied; blinds in the
higher stories brightened up and down the street when the nurses came
up with the children. A gentle breeze, that smelt of grass and woods
and flowers, fanned away the day's heat from the pavement stones,
rustled through the blossoming boughs, and sank again, leaving the
road to calm.
All the scene breathed the gentle domestic peace of the stories;
there were regular lives, dull duties done, sober and common thoughts
on every side. He felt that he needed not to listen at the windows,
for he could divine all the talk, and guess the placid and usual
channels in which the conversation flowed. Here there were no spasms,
nor raptures, nor the red storms of romance, but a safe rest;
marriage and birth and begetting were no more here than breakfast and
lunch and afternoon tea.
And then he turned away from the placid transparency of the
street, and sat down before his lamp and the papers he had so
studiously noted. A friend of his, an "impossible" man named Jenyns,
had been to see him the night before, and they had talked about the
psychology of the novelists, discussing their insight, and the depth
of their probe.
"It is all very well as far as it goes," said Jenyns. "Yes, it is
perfectly accurate. Guardsmen do like chorus-girls, the doctor's
daughter is fond of the curate, the grocer's assistant of the Baptist
persuasion has sometimes religious difficulties, 'smart' people no
doubt think a great deal about social events and complications: the
Tragic Comedians felt and wrote all that stuff, I dare say. But do
you think that is all? Do you call a description of the gilt tools on
the morocco here an exhaustive essay on Shakespeare?"
"But what more is there?" said Dale. "Don't you think, then, that
human nature has been fairly laid open? What more?"
"Songs of the frantic lupanar; delirium of the madhouse. Not
extreme wickedness, but the insensate, the unintelligible, the
lunatic passion and idea, the desire that must come from some other
sphere that we cannot even faintly imagine. Look for yourself; it is
easy."
Dale looked now at the ends and scraps of paper. On them he had
carefully registered all the secret thoughts of the day, the crazy
lusts, the senseless furies, the foul monsters that his heart had
borne, the maniac phantasies that he had harboured. In every note he
found a rampant madness, the equivalents in thought of mathematical
absurdity, of two-sided triangles, of parallel straight lines which
met.
"And we talk of absurd dreams," he said to himself. "And these are
wilder than the wildest visions. And our sins; but these are the sins
of nightmare.
"And every day," he went on, "we lead two lives, and the half of
our soul is madness, and half heaven is lit by a black sun. I say I
am a man, but who is the other that hides in me?"
The Turanians
The smoke of the tinkers' camp rose a thin pale-blue from the
heart of the wood.
Mary had left her mother at work on "things," and had gone out
with a pale and languid face into the hot afternoon. She had talked
of walking across the fields to the Green, and of having a chat with
the doctor's daughter, but she had taken the other path that crept
down towards the hollow and the dark thickets of the wood.
After all, she had felt too lazy to rouse herself, to make the
effort of conversation, and the sunlight scorched the path that was
ruled straight from stile to stile across the brown August fields,
and she could see, even from far away, how the white dust-clouds were
smoking on the road by the Green. She hesitated, and at last went
down under the far-spreading oak trees, by a winding way of grass
that cooled her feet.
Her mother, who was very kind and good, used to talk to her
sometimes on the evils of "exaggeration," on the necessity of
avoiding phrases violently expressed, words of too fierce an energy.
She remembered how she had run into the house a few days before and
had called her mother to look at a rose in the garden that "burnt
like a flame." Her mother had said the rose was very pretty, and a
little later had hinted her doubts as to the wisdom of "such very
strong expressions."
"I know, my dear Mary," she had said, "that in your case it isn't
affectation. You really feel what you say, don't you? Yes; but
is it nice to feel like that? Do you think that it's quite
right, even?"
The mother had looked at the girl with a curious wistfulness,
almost as if she would say something more, and sought for the fit
words, but could not find them. And then she merely remarked:
"You haven't seen Alfred Moorhouse since the tennis party, have
you? I must ask him to come next Tuesday; you like him?"
The daughter could not quite see the link between her fault of
"exaggeration" and the charming young barrister, but her mother's
warning recurred to her as she strayed down the shadowed path, and
felt the long dark grass cool and refreshing about her feet. She
would not have put this sensation into words, but she thought it was
as though her ankles were gently, sweetly kissed as the rich grass
touched them, and her mother would have said it was not right to
think such things.
And what a delight there was in the colours all about her! It was
as though she walked in a green cloud; the strong sunlight was
filtered through the leaves, reflected from the grass, and made
visible things—the tree-stems, the flowers, and her own
hands—seem new, transformed into another likeness. She had
walked by the woodpath over and over again, but to-day it had become
full of mystery and hinting, and every turn brought a surprise.
To-day the mere sense of being alone under the trees was an acute
secret joy, and as she went down deeper and the wood grew dark about
her, she loosened her brown hair, and when the sun shone over the
fallen tree she saw her hair was not brown, but bronze and golden,
glowing on her pure white dress.
She stayed by the well in the rock, and dared to make the dark
water her mirror, looking to right and left with shy glances and
listening for the rustle of parted boughs, before she would match her
gold with luminous ivory.
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