Resist it,
and your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to
itself, with desire for what its monstrous laws have made monstrous and
unlawful. It has been said that the great events of the world take place in the
brain. It is in the brain, and the brain only, that the great sins of the world
take place also. You, Mr. Gray, you yourself, with your rose-red youth and your
rose-white boyhood, you have had passions that have made you afraid, thoughts
that have filled you with terror, day-dreams and sleeping dreams whose mere
memory might stain your cheek with shame—”
“Stop!” faltered Dorian Gray, “stop! you bewilder me. I
don’t know what to say. There is some answer to you, but I cannot find
it. Don’t speak. Let me think. Or, rather, let me try not to
think.”
For nearly ten minutes he stood there, motionless, with parted lips and eyes
strangely bright. He was dimly conscious that entirely fresh influences were at
work within him. Yet they seemed to him to have come really from himself. The
few words that Basil’s friend had said to him – words spoken by
chance, no doubt, and with wilful paradox in them – had touched some
secret chord that had never been touched before, but that he felt was now
vibrating and throbbing to curious pulses.
Music had stirred him like that. Music had troubled him many times. But
music was not articulate. It was not a new world, but rather another chaos,
that it created in us. Words! Mere words! How terrible they were! How clear,
and vivid, and cruel! One could not escape from them. And yet what a subtle
magic there was in them! They seemed to be able to give a plastic form to
formless things, and to have a music of their own as sweet as that of viol or
of lute. Mere words! Was there anything so real as words?
Yes; there had been things in his boyhood that he had not understood. He
understood them now. Life suddenly became fiery-coloured to him. It seemed to
him that he had been walking in fire. Why had he not known it?
With his subtle smile, Lord Henry watched him. He knew the precise
psychological moment when to say nothing. He felt intensely interested. He was
amazed at the sudden impression that his words had produced, and, remembering a
book that he had read when he was sixteen, a book which had revealed to him
much that he had not known before, he wondered whether Dorian Gray was passing
through a similar experience. He had merely shot an arrow into the air. Had it
hit the mark? How fascinating the lad was!
Hallward painted away with that marvellous bold touch of his, that had the
true refinement and perfect delicacy that in art, at any rate comes only from
strength. He was unconscious of the silence.
“Basil, I am tired of standing,” cried Dorian Gray suddenly.
“I must go out and sit in the garden. The air is stifling
here.”
“My dear fellow, I am so sorry.
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