Pray Colonel, was this the same Lady you met
upon the Terriero de passa this Morning?
Col. Faith I can't tell, Sir, I had a Design to know
who that Lady was, but my Dog of a Footman, whom I
had order'd to watch her home, fell fast asleep—I gave
him a good beating for his Neglect, and I have never
seen the Rascal since.
Fred. Here he comes.
Enter Gibby.
Col. Where have you been, Sirrah?
Gib. Troth Ise been seeking yee an like yer Honour
these twa Hoors an meer, I bring yee glad Teedings, Sir.
Col. What have you found the Lady?
Gib. Geud Faite ha I, Sir—an shee's called Donna
Violante, and her Parent Don Pedro de Mendosa, an
gin yee wull gang wa mi, an't like ye'r Honour, Ise mak
you ken the Huse right weel.
Fel. O Torture! Torture! (Aside.)
Col. Ha! Violante! That's the Lady's Name of the
House where my Incognita is, sure it could not be her, at
least it was not the same House I'm confident. (Aside.)
Fred. Violante! 'Tis false, I wou'd not have you credit
him, Colonel.
Gib. The Deel burst my Blader, Sir, gin I lee.
Fel. Sirrah, I say you do lye, and I'll make you eat
it, you Dog. (kicks him) And if your Master will justify
you—
Col. Not I, faith Sir,—I answer for no body's Lyes but
my own, if you please, kick him again.
Gib. But gin he dus, Ise ne take it, Sir, gin he was a
thousand Spaniards.
[walks about in a Passion.
Col. I ow'd you a beating, Sirrah, and I'm oblig'd to
this Gentleman for taking the Trouble off my Hands;
therefore say no more, d'ye hear, Sir? (Aside to Gibby.)
Gib. Troth de I Sir, and feel tee.
Fred. This must be a Mistake, Colonel, for I know Violante
perfectly well, and I'm certain she would not meet
you upon the Terriero de passa.
Col. Don't be too positive, Frederick, now I have some
Reasons to believe it was that very Lady.
Fel. You'd very much oblige me, Sir, if you'd let me
know these Reasons.
Col. Sir.
Fel. Sir, I say I have a Right to enquire into those Reasons
you speak of.
Col. Ha, ha, really Sir I cannot conceive how you, or
any Man, can have a Right to enquire into my Thoughts.
Fel. Sir, I have a Right to every Thing that relates to
Violante—And he that traduces her Fame, and refuses to
give his Reasons for't, is a Villain. (Draws.)
Col. What the Devil have I been doing; now Blisters
on my Tongue, by Dozens. (Aside.)
Fred. Prithee Felix don't quarrel, till you know for
what; this is all a Mistake I'm positive.
Col. Look ye, Sir, that I dare draw my Sword I think
will admit of no Dispute—But tho' fighting's my Trade,
I'm not in Love with it, and think it more honourable to
decline this Business, than pursue it. This may be a Mistake;
however, I'll give you my Honour never to have
any Affair directly or indirectly with Violante, provided
she is your Violante; but if there shou'd happen to be another
of her Name, I hope you wou'd not engross all the
Violantes in the Kingdom.
Fel. Your Vanity has given me sufficient Reasons to
believe I'm not mistaken; I'm not to be impos'd upon,
Sir.
Col. Nor I bully'd, Sir.
Fel. Bully'd! S'Death, such another Word, and I'll
nail thee to the Wall.
Col. Are you sure of that, Spaniard. (Draws.)
Gib. (Draws) Say ne meer Mon, aw my Sol here's
Twa to Twa, donna fear Sir, Gibby stonds by ye for the
Honor a Scotland. (Vapours about.)
Fred. By St. Anthony you shan't fight (interposes) on
bare Suspicion, be certain of the Injury, and then.—
Fel. That I will this Moment, and then, Sir—I hope
you are to be found.—
Col. Whenever you please, Sir.
[Exit Felix.
Gib. S'Bleed, Sir, there neer was Scotsman yet that
sham'd to shew his Face. (strutting about.)
Fred. So, Quarrels spring up like Mushrooms, in a Minute:
Violante, and he, was but just reconcil'd, and you
have furnish'd him with fresh Matter for falling out again,
and I am certain, Colonel, Gibby is in the Wrong.
Gib. Gin I be Sir, the Mon that tald me leed, and gin
he dud, the Deel be my Landlard, Hell my Winter Quarters,
and a Rope my Winding Sheet, Gin I dee no lik
him as lang as I can hold a Stick in my Hond, now
see yee.
Col. I am sorry for what I have said, for the Lady's Sake,
but who could divine, that she was his Mistress; prithee
who is this warm Spark?
Fred. He is the Son of one of our Grandees, nam'd
Don Lopez de Pementell, a very honest Gentleman, but
something passionate in what relates to his Love—He is
an only Son, which perhaps may be one Reason for indulging
his Passion.
Col. When Parents have but one Child, they either
make a Madman, or a Fool of him.
Fred. He is not the only Child, he has a Sister; but I
think, thro' the Severity of his Father, who would have
married her against her Inclination, she has made her Escape,
and notwithstanding he has offer'd five hundred
Pounds, he can get no Tydings of her.
Col. Ha! How long has she been missing?
Fred. Nay, but since last Night, it seems.
Col. Last Night! The very Time! How went she?
Fred. No body can tell, they conjecture thro' the Window.
Col. I'm transported! This must be the Lady I caught;
what sort of a Woman is she?
Fred. Middle siz'd, a lovely brown, a fine, pouting
Lip, Eyes that roul and languish, and seem to speak the
exquisite Pleasure that her Arms could give!
Col. Oh! I'm fir'd with his Description—'Tis the very
she—What's her Name?
Fred. Isabella—You are transported, Colonel.
Col. I have a natural Tendency in me to the Flesh,
thou know'st, and who can hear of Charms so exquisite,
and yet remain unmov'd? Oh, how I long for the appointed
Hour! I'll to the Terriero de passa, and wait my
Happiness; if she fails to meet me, I'll once more attempt
to find her at Violante's in spite of her Brother's Jealousy.
(Aside) Dear Frederick, I beg your Pardon, but I had
forgot, I was to meet a Gentleman upon Business at Five,
I'll endeavour to dispatch him, and wait on you again as
soon as possible.—
Fred. Your humble Servant, Colonel.
[Exit.
Col. Gibby, I have no Business with you at present.
[Exit Colonel.
Gib. That's weel—naw will I gang and seek this Loon,
and gar him gang with me to Don Pedro's Huse—Gin
he'll no gang of himsel, Ise gar him gang by the Lug,
Sir; Godswarbit Gibby hates a Lear.
[Exit.
Scene changes to Violante's Lodgings.
Enter Violante and Isabella.
Isab. The Hour draws on, Violante, and now my Heart
begins to fail me, but I resolve to venture for all that.
Vio. What, does your Courage sink, Isabella.
Isab. Only the Force of Resolution a little retreated,
but I'll rally it again for all that.
Enter Flora.
Flo. Don Felix is coming up, Madam.
Isab. My Brother! Which Way shall I get out—Dispatch
him as soon as you can, dear Violante.
[Exit into the Closet.
Vio. I will. (Enter Felix in a surly Posture.) Felix,
what brings you back so soon, did not I say to-morrow?
Fel. My Passion choaks me, I cannot speak, oh, I shall
burst! (Aside.)
[Throws himself into a Chair.
Vio. Bless me! are you not well, my Felix?
Fel. Yes,—No,—I don't know what I am.
Vio. Hey Day! What's the Matter now? Another jealous
Whim!
Fel. With what an Air she carries it.—I sweat at her
Impudence. (Aside.)
Vio. If I were in your Place, Felix, I'd chuse to stay
at home, when these Fits of Spleen were upon me, and
not trouble such Persons as are not oblig'd to bear with
them.
[Here he affects to be careless of her.
Fel. I am very sensible, Madam, of what you mean:
I disturb you no doubt, but were I in a better Humour, I
shou'd not incommode you less. I am but too well convinc'd,
that you could easily dispense with my Visit.
Vio. When you behave yourself as you ought to do, no
Company so welcome—But when you reserve me for your
ill Nature, I wave your Merit, and consider what's due
to myself—And I must be so free to tell you, Felix, that
these Humours of yours will abate, if not absolutely destroy,
the very Principles of Love.
Fel. (Rising) And I must be so free to tell you, Madam,
that since you have made such ill Returns to the Respect
that I have paid you, all you do shall be indifferent to me
for the Future, and you shall find me abandon your Empire
with so little Difficulty, that I'll convince the World
your Chains are not so hard to break as your Vanity would
tempt you to believe—I cannot brook the Provocation
you give.
Vio. This is not to be born—Insolent! You abandon!
You! Whom I have so often forbad ever to see me more!
Have you not fall'n at my Feet? Implor'd my Favour
and Forgiveness—Did you not trembling wait, and wish,
and sigh, and swear yourself into my Heart? Ingrateful
Man! If my Chains are so easily broke as you pretend,
then you are the silliest Coxcomb living, you did not
break 'em long ago; and I must think him capable of
brooking any thing on whom such Usage could make no
Impression.
Isab. (Peeping) A Duce take your Quarrels, she'll never
think on me.
Fel. I always believed, Madam, my Weakness was the
greatest Addition to your Power, you would be less imperious,
had my Inclination been less forward to oblige
you—You have indeed forbad me your Sight, but your
Vanity even then assured you I would return, and I was
Fool enough to feed your Pride.—Your Eyes, with all
their boasted Charms, have acquired the greatest Glory
in conquering me.—And the brightest Passage of your
Life is, wounding this Heart with such Arms as pierce but
few Persons of my Rank.
[Walks about in a great Pet.
Vio. Matchless Arrogance! True Sir, I should have kept
Measures better with you, if the Conquest had been worth
preserving, but we easily hazard what gives us no Pain to
lose—As for my Eyes, you are mistaken if you think
they have vanquished none but you; there are Men above
your boasted Rank who have confess'd their Power, when
their Misfortune in pleasing you made them obtain such
a disgraceful Victory.
Fel. Yes, Madam, I am no Stranger to your Victories.
Vio. And what you call the brightest Passage of my Life,
is not the least glorious Part of yours.
Fel. Ha, ha, do'nt put yourself into a Passion, Madam,
for I assure you, after this Day, I shall give you no
Trouble—You may meet your Sparks on the Terriero de
Passa at Four in the Morning, without the least Regard of
mine—For when I quit your Chamber, the World shan't
bring me back.
Vio. I am so well pleas'd with your Resolution, I don't
care how soon you take your Leave.—But what you mean
by the Terriero de Passa at Four in the Morning, I can't
guess.
Fel. No, no, no, not you—You was not upon the
Terriero de Passa at Four this Morning.
Vio. No, I was not; but if I was, I hope I may walk
where I please, and at what Hour I please, without asking
your Leave.
Fel. Oh, doubtless, Madam! And you might meet Colonel
Britton there, and afterwards send your Emissary to
fetch him to your House—And upon your Father's
coming in, thrust him into your Bed-Chamber—without
asking my Leave. 'Tis no Business of mine if you are exposed
among all the Footmen in Town—Nay, if they Ballad
you, and cry you about at a Halfpenny a-piece—They
may, without my Leave.
Vio. Audacious! Don't provoke me—don't; my Reputation
is not to be sported with (Going up to him) at this
Rate—No, Sir, it is not. (bursts into Tears) Inhuman
Felix! Oh, Isabella, what a Train of Ills hast thou
brought on me? (Aside.)
Fel. Ha! I cannot bear to see her weep—A Woman's
Tears are far more fatal than our Swords. (Aside.) Oh,
Violante—S'Death! what a Dog am I? Now have I no
Power to stir;—Dost not thou know such a Person as Colonel
Britton? Prithee tell me, didst not thou meet him at
Four this Morning upon the Terriero de Passa?
Vio. Were it not to clear my Fame, I would not answer
thee, thou black Ingrate!—But I cannot bear to be
reproach'd with what I even blush to think of, much less
to act; by Heaven, I have not seen the Terriero de Passa
this Day.
Fel. Did not a Scots Footman attack you in the Street
neither, Violante?
Vio. Yes, but he mistook me for another, or he was
drunk, I know not which.
Fel. And do not you know this Scots Colonel?
Vio. Pray ask me no more Questions, this Night shall
clear my Reputation, and leave you without Excuse for
your base Suspicions; more than this I shall not satisfy
you, therefore pray leave me.
Fel. Didst thou ever love me, Violante?
Vio. I'll answer nothing.—You was in Haste to be gone
just now, I should be very well pleas'd to be alone, Sir.
[She sits down, and turns aside.
Fel. I shall not long interrupt your Contemplation.—Stubborn
to the last. (Aside.)
Vio. Did ever Woman involve herself as I have done?
Fel. Now would I give one of my Eyes to be Friends
with her; for something whispers to my Soul she is not
guilty.—(He pauses, then pulls a Chair, and sits by her at
a little Distance, looking at her some time without speaking. Then
draws a little nearer to her.) Give me your Hand
at Parting, however Violante, won't you, (Here he lays his
open upon her Knee several times.) won't you—won't you—won't
you!
Vio. (Half regarding him) Won't I do what?
Fel. You know what I would have, Violante. Oh, my
Heart!
Vio. (Smiling.) I thought my Chains were easily broke.
(Lays her Hand into his.)
Fel. (Draws his Chair close to her, and kisses her Hand
in a Rapture.) Too well thou knowest thy Strength.—Oh
my charming Angel, my Heart is all thy own. Forgive
my hasty Passion; 'tis the Transport of a Love sincere!
Don Pedro within.
Pedro. Bid Sancho get a new Wheel to my Chariot presently.
Vio. Bless me! My Father return'd! What shall we do
now, Felix? We are ruin'd, past Redemption.
Fel. No, no, no, my Love; I can leap from thy Closet
Window.
[Runs to the Door where Isabella is, who
claps too the Door, and bolts it within side.
Isab. (Peeping.) Say you so: But I shall prevent you.
Fel. Confusion! Some Body bolts the Door within-side;
I'll see who you have conceal'd here, if I die for't:
Oh Violante! hast thou again sacrific'd me to my Rival? (Draws.)
Vio. By Heaven thou hast no Rival in my Heart, let
that suffice—Nay, sure you will not let my Father find
you here—Distraction!
Fel. Indeed but I shall—except you command this Door
to be open'd, and that Way conceal me from his Sight.
[He struggles with her to come to the Door.
Vio. Hear me, Felix—Though I were sure the refusing
what you ask would separate us for ever, by all that's powerful
you shall not enter here. Either you do love me, or
you do not; convince me by your Obedience.
Fel. That's not the Matter in debate—I will know who
is in this Closet, let the Consequence be what it will. Nay,
nay, nay, you strive in vain; I will go in.
Vio. You shall not go in—
Enter Don Pedro.
Ped. Hey day! What's here to do? I will go in, and
you shan't go in—and, I will go in—Why, who are you,
Sir?
Fel. 'Sdeath! What shall I say now!
Ped. Don Felix, pray, what's your Business in my
House? Ha, Sir?
Vio. Oh Sir, what Miracle return'd you home so soon?
Some Angel 'twas that brought my Father back to succour
the distress'd—This Ruffian he, I cannot call him
Gentleman—has committed such an uncommon Rudeness,
as the most profligate Wretch would be asham'd
to own—
Fel. Ha, what the Devil does she mean! (Aside.)
Vio. As I was at my Devotion in my Closet, I heard a
loud knocking at our Door, mix'd with a Woman's Voice,
which seem'd to imply she was in Danger.—
Fel. I am confounded! (Aside.)
Vio. I flew to the Door with utmost Speed, where a
Lady vail'd rush'd in upon me; who, falling on her Knees,
begged my Protection, from a Gentleman, who, she said,
pursued her: I took Compassion on her Tears, and locked
her into this Closet; but in the Surprize having left open
the Door, this very Person whom you see, with his Sword
drawn, ran in, protesting, if I refus'd to give her up to
his Revenge, he'd force the Door.
Fel. What in the Name of Goodness does she mean to
do! Hang me! (Aside.)
Vio. I strove with him till I was out of Breath, and had
you not come as you did, he must have enter'd—But he's
in Drink, I suppose, or he could not have been guilty of
such an Indecorum.
[Leering at Felix.
Ped. I'm amazed!
Fel. The Devil never fail'd a Woman at a Pinch:
What a Tale has she form'd in a minute—In Drink,
quotha; a good hint: I'll lay hold on't to bring myself
off.
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