Well, grant it then,
And tell me, in the modesty of honour338,
Why you have given me such clear lights339 of favour,
Bade me come smiling and cross-gartered to you,
To put on yellow stockings and to frown
Upon Sir Toby and the lighter342 people?
And, acting343 this in an obedient hope,
Why have you suffered344 me to be imprisoned,
Kept in a dark house, visited by the priest,
And made the most notorious geck346 and gull
That e’er invention played on?347 Tell me why.
OLIVIA Alas, Malvolio, this is not my writing,
Though, I confess, much like the character349,
But out of350 question ’tis Maria’s hand.
And now I do bethink me, it was she
First told me thou wast mad; then cam’st352 in smiling,
And in such forms which here were presupposed353
Upon thee in the letter. Prithee be content.
This practice hath most shrewdly passed355 upon thee,
But when we know the grounds and authors of it,
Thou shalt be both the plaintiff and the judge
Of thine own cause.
FABIAN Good madam, hear me speak,
And let no quarrel nor no brawl to come
Taint the condition361 of this present hour,
Which I have wondered362 at. In hope it shall not,
Most freely I confess, myself and Toby
Set this device against Malvolio here,
Upon some stubborn and uncourteous parts365
We had conceived against366 him. Maria writ
The letter at Sir Toby’s great importance367,
In recompense whereof he hath married her.
How with a sportful malice it was followed369,
May rather pluck on370 laughter than revenge,
If that371 the injuries be justly weighed
That have on both sides passed.
OLIVIA Alas, poor fool, how have they baffled373 thee!
FESTE Why, ‘Some are born great, some achieve greatness,
and some have greatness thrown upon them.’ I was one, sir,
in this interlude376; one Sir Topas, sir, but that’s all one. ‘By the
Lord, fool, I am not mad.’ But do you remember? ‘Madam,
why laugh you at such a barren rascal? An you smile not,
he’s gagged.’ And thus the whirligig379 of time brings in his
revenges.
MALVOLIO I’ll be revenged on the whole pack of you.
[Exit]
OLIVIA He hath been most notoriously abused.
ORSINO Pursue him and entreat him to a peace.
He hath not told us of the captain yet.
When that is known and golden time convents385,
A solemn combination386 shall be made
Of our dear souls.— Meantime, sweet sister,
We will not part from hence.388— Cesario, come —
For so you shall be, while you are a man.
But when in other habits390 you are seen,
Orsino’s mistress and his fancy’s391 queen.
Exeunt [all, except Feste]
FESTE Sings
When that I was and a392 little tiny boy,
With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
A foolish thing was but a toy394,
For the rain it raineth every day.
But when I came to man’s estate396,
With hey, ho, etc.397
’Gainst knaves and thieves men shut their gate,
For the rain, etc.
But when I came, alas! to wive400,
With hey, ho, etc.
By swaggering402 could I never thrive,
For the rain, etc.
But when I came unto my beds404,
With hey, ho, etc.
With toss-pots406 still had drunken heads,
For the rain, etc.
A great while ago the world begun,
With hey, ho, etc.
But that’s all one, our play is done,
And we’ll strive to please you every day.
[Exit]
TEXTUAL NOTES
F = First Folio text of 1623, the only authority for the play
F2 = a correction introduced in the Second Folio text of 1632
F3 = a correction introduced in the Third Folio text of 1663
Ed = a correction introduced by a later editor
SD = stage direction
SH = speech heading (i.e. speaker’s name)
List of parts = Ed
1.1.1 SH ORSINO = Ed. F = Duke
1.2.15 Arion = Ed. F = Orion
1.3.88 curl by = Ed. F = coole my 90 me = F2. F = we does’t = Ed. F = dost 120 set = Ed. F = sit 123 That’s = F3. F = That
1.5.4 SH FESTE = Ed. F = Clo. 156 SD Viola = F2. F = Violenta
2.2.30 our = F2. F = O 31 made of = Ed. F = made, if
2.3.2 diluculo spelled Deliculo in F 24 leman = Ed. F = Lemon 122 a nayword = Ed. F = an ayword
2.4.56 Fly away, fly = Ed. F = Fye away, fie 91 I = Ed. F = It
2.5.102 staniel = Ed. F = stallion 125 born = Ed. F = become 126 achieve = F2. F = atcheeues 154 dear = F2. F = deero
3.1.7 king = F2. F = Kings 65 wise men = Ed. F = wisemens
3.2.7 thee the = F3. F = the
3.4.23 SH OLIVIA = F2. F = Mal 64 tang = F2.
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