Now you’re in love with someone else that you just met? Guess it’s true: men love with their first. How do you know this won’t happen again? —FL

Romeo

You’re the one who was hard on me about Rosaline.

Friar Laurence

Because you were obsessed with her. But not because you loved her. There’s a difference, IMHO. —FL

Romeo

You told me to forget about her!

Friar Laurence

I didn’t mean by finding someone else! —FL

Romeo

You’ve got to understand. Rosaline never loved me. But Juliet does. She really does.

Friar Laurence

Ugh. Fine. Come with me. Let’s plan this secret wedding. It may be the only thing that ends the hate between your two families anyway. —FL

[Scene 4]

Mercutio

Srsly, where’s Romeo?

Benvolio

Got me. He didn’t come last night.

Mercutio

This is all Rosaline’s fault. She’s gonna lead him on until he goes legit insane. Did I tell you I saw her on a dating app? I bet she’s swiping right like mad….

Benvolio

I heard that Tybalt sent a letter to Romeo’s father’s house.

Mercutio

I bet he wants 2 fight.

Benvolio

Romeo will fight back, in that case.

Mercutio

Yup, he’s a goner. He’s already dead. Luv has killed him.

Do u think he stands a chance against Tybalt?

Benvolio

IDK. What’s the 411 on Tybalt?

Mercutio

He’s tough. Rly tough. He knows exactly what he’s doing.

Let’s just say I wouldn’t want 2 be on the receiving end. He knows how 2 deliver a final blow to the .

Benvolio

Let’s check in on Romeo.

Group text: Mercutio, Romeo, Benvolio

Mercutio

Bonjour, Romeo. Gotta admit, u faked us out pretty good last nite.

Romeo

Hey, guys. What do you mean I faked you out?

Mercutio

Ya tricked us. U know wut I’m saying.

Romeo

Sorrrry. I had something really important to do.

Mercutio

Y’okay. “Important.”

Romeo

That’s one way of putting it.

Mercutio

Out with it then! So how was her pink flower?

Benvolio

Ugh. Mercutio.

Romeo

Let’s just say it’s been pollinated.