Souls

and bodies hath he divorced three, and his incensement215 at

this moment is so implacable that satisfaction216 can be none

but by pangs of death and sepulchre. Hob, nob, is his word217:

give’t or take’t.

VIOLA    I will return again into the house and desire some

conduct220 of the lady. I am no fighter. I have heard of some

kind of men that put quarrels purposely on others, to taste221

their valour. Belike this is a man of that quirk.222

SIR TOBY    Sir, no. His indignation derives itself out of a very

competent224 injury: therefore, get you on and give him his

desire. Back you shall not to the house, unless you undertake

that226 with me which with as much safety you might answer

him: therefore, on, or strip your sword stark naked, for

meddle you must, that’s certain, or forswear to wear iron228

about you.

VIOLA    This is as uncivil as strange. I beseech you do me

this courteous office, as to know of231 the knight what my

offence to him is. It is something of my negligence, nothing

of my purpose.

SIR TOBY    I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this

gentleman till my return.

Exit Toby

VIOLA    Pray you, sir, do you know of this matter?

FABIAN    I know the knight is incensed against you, even to a

mortal arbitrement238, but nothing of the circumstance more.

VIOLA    I beseech you what manner of man is he?

FABIAN    Nothing of that wonderful promise, to read240 him by

his form, as you are like241 to find him in the proof of his valour.

He is, indeed, sir, the most skilful, bloody and fatal opposite

that you could possibly have found in any part of Illyria. Will

you walk towards him? I will make your peace with him if I

can.

VIOLA    I shall be much bound to you for’t: I am one that

had rather go with sir priest than sir knight. I care not who

knows so much of my mettle.248

Exeunt

Enter Toby and Andrew

SIR TOBY    Why, man, he’s a very devil. I have not seen such a

firago. I had a pass250 with him, rapier, scabbard and all, and he

gives me the stuck in with such a mortal motion251 that it is

inevitable. And on the answer, he pays you252 as surely as your

feet hits the ground they step on. They say he has been

fencer to the Sophy.254

SIR ANDREW    Pox255 on’t, I’ll not meddle with him.

SIR TOBY    Ay, but he will not now be pacified. Fabian can

scarce hold257 him yonder.

SIR ANDREW    Plague on’t, an I thought he had been valiant and

so cunning in fence, I’d have seen him damned ere259 I’d have

challenged him. Let him let the matter slip, and I’ll give him

my horse, grey Capilet.

SIR TOBY    I’ll make the motion.262 Stand here, make a good show on’t.—

Aside

This shall end without the perdition of souls.263

Marry, I’ll ride264 your horse as well as I ride you.

Enter Fabian and Viola

Aside to Fabian

I have his horse to take up265 the quarrel. I have

persuaded him the youth’s a devil.

FABIAN    He is as horribly conceited267 of him, and pants and

looks pale, as if a bear were at his heels.

To Viola

SIR TOBY    There’s no remedy, sir, he will fight with

you for’s oath270 sake. Marry, he hath better bethought him of

his quarrel271, and he finds that now scarce to be worth talking

of: therefore draw for the supportance of his vow. He protests272

he will not hurt you.

Aside

VIOLA    Pray God defend me! A little thing would274

make me tell them how much I lack of a man.

To Viola

FABIAN    Give ground if you see him furious.

SIR TOBY    Come, Sir Andrew, there’s no remedy. The gentleman

will, for his honour’s sake, have one bout with you. He cannot

by the duello279 avoid it. But he has promised me, as he is a

gentleman and a soldier, he will not hurt you. Come on, to’t.

SIR ANDREW    Pray God he keep his oath!

Enter Antonio

To Fabian/They draw their swords

VIOLA    I do assure you, ’tis against my will.

ANTONIO    Put up283 your sword. If this young gentleman

Have done offence, I take the fault on me.

If you offend him, I for him defy you.

SIR TOBY    You, sir? Why, what are you?

ANTONIO    One, sir, that for his love dares yet do more

Than you have heard him brag to you he will.

They draw

SIR TOBY    Nay, if you be an undertaker, I am for289 you.

Enter Officers

FABIAN    O, good Sir Toby, hold! Here come the officers.

To Antonio

SIR TOBY    I’ll be with you anon.291

To Sir Andrew

VIOLA    Pray, sir, put your sword up, if you please.

SIR ANDREW    Marry, will I, sir. And for that293 I promised you, I’ll be

as good as my word. He will bear you easily and reins294 well.

Indicates Antonio

FIRST OFFICER    This is the man; do thy office.

SECOND OFFICER    Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit296 of Count

Orsino.

ANTONIO    You do mistake me, sir.

FIRST OFFICER    No, sir, no jot. I know your favour299 well,

Though now you have no sea-cap on your head.

Take him away: he knows I know him well.

To Viola

ANTONIO    I must obey.— This comes with seeking you.

But there’s no remedy, I shall answer303 it.

What will you do, now my necessity

Makes me to ask you for my purse? It grieves me

Much more for what I cannot do for you

Than what befalls myself. You stand amazed307;

But be of comfort.

SECOND OFFICER    Come, sir, away.

To Viola

ANTONIO    I must entreat of you some of that money.

VIOLA    What money, sir?

For the fair kindness you have showed me here,

And part313 being prompted by your present trouble,

Out of my lean and low ability

I’ll lend you something. My having315 is not much.

I’ll make division of my present316 with you.

Offers money

Hold, there’s half my coffer.317

ANTONIO    Will you deny318 me now?

Is’t possible that my deserts319 to you

Can lack persuasion? Do not tempt320 my misery,

Lest that it make me so unsound321 a man

As to upbraid you with those kindnesses

That I have done for you.

VIOLA    I know of none,

Nor know I you by voice or any feature.

I hate ingratitude more in a man

Than lying, vainness327, babbling, drunkenness,

Or any taint of vice whose strong corruption

Inhabits our frail blood.

ANTONIO    O heavens themselves!

SECOND OFFICER    Come, sir, I pray you go.

ANTONIO    Let me speak a little. This youth that you see here

I snatched one half out of the jaws of death,

Relieved him with such sanctity334 of love,

And to his image335, which methought did promise

Most venerable worth336, did I devotion.

FIRST OFFICER    What’s that to us? The time goes by. Away!

ANTONIO    But O, how vile an idol proves this god.

Thou hast, Sebastian, done good feature339 shame.

In nature there’s no blemish but the mind.

None can be called deformed but the unkind.341

Virtue is beauty, but the beauteous evil

Are empty trunks o’erflourished343 by the devil.

FIRST OFFICER    The man grows mad.